This is a wonderful piece.
I know the benefits of writing, be it in paper or online. I’ve read about them many times. I know, because I’ve tried and seen the results. However, most of the time what I read about journaling felt either exaggerating or old, boring advices. Everyone says the same and I find myself bummed out at the end of the page because, “I already know that, what else is new…”
This post somehow triggers that “YES, SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS ME!” reaction from the bottom of my heart. I don’t know what’s different? Haha… perhaps the way you say explain it, or how the points are all true, real experiences that I experienced too XD
In college, I had diaries. I didn’t write every day, but once I wrote, it was often a long post of about 2k words or more. Sometimes I even wrote in public transport, afraid the thing on my mind would be long forgotten if I waited to reach my destination. I still have those diaries. The contents are awful and sometimes sooo embarrassing LOL…
After I graduated, though, I wrote less and less. Writing long stories needs time, and I’d stop writing after a moment, but then something else caught up and I left the story and in the end I found that I’d written many unfinished pieces. I like coming back to my diaries and read them, sometimes what thought I had surprises me during my bad mood times, making me feel better and energized.
But now, my diaries have stories without conclusion, and they leave me feeling rather empty. Somewhere along the way I decided to not write if I didn’t have time, but that strategy backfired.
I became more depressed-prone because I had no outlet, and I took my frustration to other people. I don’t snap at them, I just come to a close friend to talk/whine, but I realized recently that pouring your hearts out to a friend/confidant is not always the wisest choice. Friends give us their opinions, but other people’s opinion, even though it makes us feel better, only a temporary remedy (and it’s toxic when it makes us feel worse, and sadly this happens more often than not). It’s different with talking to ourselves (through writing), because we know ourselves the most, and therefore we’ll know what we need to do next, and that solution comes from within so it’s actually more accurate and effective in helping us solve our problems.
I now want to start writing diaries again (or journaling, as you put it. Journaling sounds more sophisticated and productive-oriented though haha…). I want to feel closer to myself. And, really, that part about writing something I disagree a few months later; it’s so true. In this post, I find encouragement.
Okay, so the comment has become long enough to be a post on its own, so I’m gonna stop here XDD. Need to start writing in my diary.