she explains how our brains re-organize the entire world around us when we shift what “needing” to do something to “wanting” to do it.
Here’s How To Become Courageous And Stop Following The Pack
Benjamin P. Hardy
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Both “need” and “should” (from my other highlight of this post) are words on my “do not use list” — because I don’t WANT to use them. :) I learned how they create artificial and external pressure on me and others in dialogue. One of my favorite examples of this is budgeting. I am not a fan of budgeting, so my self talk (or talk to others — haha!) used to be “Ugh, I have to do my budget.” As you can imagine, this was not very inspiring. But I can detach from the task itself and focus on the why — why am I doing the budget? After asking “why” a few times, I arrive at the following: “I have an important message that I want to share with the world because I genuinely believe it will be a better place when more people experience it, so I want to make effective decisions with my current finances to enable me to grow the business and expand my reach and my impact.” Now, I get to say: “I want to do my budget!” — And the actual minutes spent on budget are attached to my “why” which enables me to stay away from words like “need” and “should” — which honestly make me cringe now when I hear them. Practice “could” instead of “should” and “want” or “would like” instead of “need.” Great post, Ben!!