Metal, Wrestling, Resurrection, Failure and Everything in Between

We look up to stories about heroes in this world whether they are brave firefighters who rescue puppies from burning buildings, athletes who overcome disabilities and go on to win championships and even successful multi billionaires who like to build walls. Stories about individuals who ascend up above and inspire from below.

I on the other hand always had fascination and empathy with the opposite, stories about descent, decline and doom.

· Charles Buckoswki’s Post Office describing his life as a letter carrier whose existence revolves around working, drinking, fighting, womanizing and gambling in a never ending circle of descent.

· The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka, where a man is transformed into a bug but is so much of a family/office drone that he spends all of his time trying to fulfill his obligations rather than deal with his condition.

· William S. Burroughs autobiographical novel Junkie about the mundane, morose and monotone day to day existence of a drug addict.

I find that there is something really honest about these stories where the characters trap themselves in their own repetitively uninspiring existence.

Is this a case of morbid curiosity, does their misery provide me with an ego boost where I feel good about my supposedly superior position in life? Do I want these tragic heroes to overcome their challenges or do I take joy in their failings?

I’ve recently watched two documentaries about two of my favourite things, professional wrestling and metal. One was “The Resurrection of Jake Roberts” about a once prominent star who has fallen from grace due to substance abuse. The other was “I am Thor” about a cult musician who combined heavy metal, bodybuilding and feats of strength but never quite made it. The audience watches them try to succeed and sometimes fail in their quest to turn their lives around.

In the case of Jake Roberts we see his struggle to overcome health problems, remain sober and regain the love and respect of this family and peers. In the case of Thor we see a former sensation as he tries year after year to stage his comeback and find his fame in the music industry. Neither character fully succeeds, Jake keeps falling off the wagon and turns up drunk time and time again while Thor continues his touring playing to less than packed houses year after year. Their journeys are inspirational but are far from perfect as we discover how easily their emotions bruise and egos shatter.

The Jake Roberts story presents a uniquely talented wrestler who rose to fame with his cold blooded persona and unique mastery of ring psychology. Over the years substance abuse has reduced him to performing in small backwater venues where he looks like a shadow of his former self. He is ostracized from his family and is known among his peers as someone who had it all but had squandered it away. The documentary follows his journey towards physical and emotional rehabilitation by adapting the Yoga practice of another ex-wrestler named Diamond Dallas Page. We find out a lot about Jake, his emotional frailty caused by an abusive father, his insecurities and his need for affirmation from others. Jake tries, fails and somewhat succeeds in becoming better but there is a lot of doubt whether this success is permanent. He is so damaged that perhaps there is no hope for him ever becoming normal again. There is also good in him especially in contrast to when his dark side comes in his drinking bouts.

I am Thor is a tale about a performer who was bound to be a breakout star in the 70s and into the 80s but never quite made it. We learn about the emotional toll that the struggle to succeed has taken. Thor is lost and feels that regaining spotlight is the only way to find himself. He continues touring year after year, sometimes with success but more often with setbacks as disappointment always seeps in. This journey is taking a toll on his health as evident by the amount of medication he has to take to allow for his very physical stage show and demanding travel schedule. He is blind in one eye, suffered a stroke, a divorce and a nervous breakdown. He keeps soldiering on, still performing his feats of strength on stage include blowing up a hot water bottle with his mouth.

There is something both admirable about these characters and pitiful at the same time, they are determined to improve their lives but we see time and time again that the obstacle is really themselves and their perception of what happiness is. For Jake the goal is to appear in the WWE’s Royal Rumble with sobriety being the mean rather than an end, Thor wants to make it in the business or die trying rather than focus on his own happiness that comes from simply being able to perform and entertain his fans. The audience know the answers to their problems, they need to stop living for others and focus on themselves but still prefer to root for their comeback rather than their happiness.

Do we enjoy our position of superiority where we know what to do yet we are curious to see how these two will screw it all up? I was catching myself thinking “I knew it” when Jake was missing and turned up drunk or “I told you so” when the gig Thor was supposed to headline turned out to have few fans in attendance. Do I enjoy seeing them fail instead of succeed for the comic and tragic entertainment value cause by the chaos they inflict on themselves and the people that they love? At the end I don’t think that it’s quite that simple, although I am entertained I do feel for these characters as they become sympathetic to me thought their kindness, love as well as humility.

I laugh and wince at their misfortune but also want them to succeed, not for their comeback to materialize but for them to find happiness. I find their pursuit to be sad and pathetic but I do root for their small victories as that is what brings them closer to true happiness instead of what they seek. For Jake Roberts it was getting to spend time with his daughter where they smile and laugh and are together perhaps for the last time. And for Thor it was something simple as autographing a fan’s butt that the fan promised to have later tattooed. They both seek a connection with humanity that they have lacked all their lives and hopefully will find a portion of that during their time on this planet.

We tend to celebrate the big heroes in life and look up to them for inspiration but it is just as important to look to those who are less than perfect and understand their struggle and their weakness in order to feel the empathy that connects all of us as human beings.