When I was in high school I shamefully did the same as a white person to my friend that was Cherokee.
He put it to me much the same way you excellently described here. If you are white and want to be an ally to a minority cause then great, but understand:
- It is not our responsibility to educate you. You must educate yourself.
- If we do decide to educate you, realize you are being blessed with an undue favor.
- Because you are a friend or an ally, you can educate and work for change in the white community regarding minority issues, but you do not have the right or authority to debate or argue about racial matters with a minority.
- You can never truly know what it is like to walk in the shoes of a minority.
I imagine that this applies for all actively subjugated and persecuted minorities.