You’re with someone you love for years, everything has been wonderful between you for months and then out of nowhere. BAM! A fight breaks out between the two of you.
How many of us have been here?
Me, it’s been too many times, In fact, it’s the fighting in a relationship that makes me not to want to be in one at all. Though of course, it’s just in those moments. Once it’s over, we’ve moved on and everything’s okay I find myself unable to imagine life without this person. I know deep inside me that I am better off with her in my life.
So how do you prevent fights? Are they inevitable? Is it just an inescapable aspect to love?… I hate this part so much yet everything else is so great.
I’m aware I have an ego, we all do, she does for sure and it really irritates my ego when she accuses my ego of thinking I am better than her. I don’t know where or how the F@#k she comes up with this shit.
It comes down to misunderstanding each other. Sometimes I believe she really gets me but when we get in fights it seems that she believes in her head that I am someone completely different from who I really am. If you really want to piss me off and escalate a disagreement start making false accusations at who I am as a person. My ego will surely not tolerate this form of slander.
I guess Men are from Mars and Women from Venus as someone once said. I’m not sure why these things even happen, it saddens me, it ruins my day, ruins the next day and can even ruin the whole week before we both put aside our feelings of being upset and go back to normal.
In most cases, my true anger and frustration come from the fact that a problem manifested in our relationship, not the problem itself. I usually don’t actually care about what started it as it’s usually something stupid. I’m just severely inconvenienced by the change in energy between us shifting from a normally very positive state to a very negative one.
My natural state is happiness and harmony, I need to be in a state of flow to be fully optimized in my existence. When someone threatens that I have a very low tolerance towards it and my demeanor will not be received as positive. If I only could learn how to diffuse these situations effectively without becoming a pissed-off individual. Maybe I can learn.
It takes two to tango someone else once said…
Perhaps I need to take dance lessons and learn how to take the lead so we can tango down a more constructive path.
I am responsible for how I respond so I acknowledge I could respond better.
At the end of the day I love her so much and this will all be but a small blip in the beautiful story and unfolding that is our love for each other.
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