Update 9 hrs later: I’m not giving in to the fear as much and I’m starting to see more clearly as I learn more information. It appears these riots are being instigated from outside forces. I’m upset about the police abusing people but there may be a hidden agenda trying to divide us further.
Below is the article I wrote earlier from a different headspace, one where I was not feeling as level headed as I am now. Thank you for reading.
I cannot even begin to express the anxiety and craziness I’ve been feeling since yesterday, June 1st. Questions and thoughts racing through my mind with uncertainty.
Should I buy a gun?
Should I stack Silver and Gold?
Is Martial Law really coming to a neighborhood near you?
I’ve been terrified of the government obtaining too much power since I had my first realization in 2005 deep on LSD as a 19-year-old soon to be a college drop out. I knew then at that moment this system was not working and eventually collapse was coming. I’ve felt in my bones ever since with absolute uncertainty as to what that will truly look like. I really do worry what that collapse looks like and if it's truly the hidden powers and their agenda to enslave humanity even further than they already have.
First COVID-19, then these protests sparked by Geroge Floyd’s death. It’s overwhelming the number of racial murders committed by those sworn to protect that don't seem to ever stop. Police brutality has been going on for years! Now the president is deploying “thousands and thousands” of military personnel on civilians. I have a hard time seeing this as a form of good other than showing us we must create serious change in this country to oppose those in control abusing their power. I think it goes much deeper than just the president. I don’t trust anyone who made it to the white house nor do I truly trust that they are the ones who are really in control.
I remember in 2013 an ex-cop I knew, who was a good man. After several private messages back and forth had unfriended me on Facebook because of some of the anti-police things I was posting. It made me sad, but even he in those private messages had admitted that he gets scared of cops. He doesn't know if one is having a bad day and gets just as nervous as the rest of us when there is a patrol car behind him. We were supposed to meet and chat in person, but that never happened and we lost touch.
This was a white, male ex-cop telling me he is scared of the police yet somehow still supports them. At least he quit the biggest gang in our country and what I’ve referred to for years as “traitors of the human race”. Don't get me wrong I know they are not all bad, and many are really good. I’ve just been abused by the police more times than I can count even as a privileged white male!
My PTSD from the police runs deep in my subconscious yet I can't even begin to imagine what our brothers and sisters of color have to deal with. I’m sure it’s amplified significantly for them in ways I can't fathom. My heart goes out to you all.
Back the story; I was ultimately saying something was wrong here, that the police were somehow being brainwashed or put up to this senseless violence and police brutality from hidden sources with a hidden agenda. Of course, this was only speculation on my end and of course seen as too radical. This was seven years ago too! But how is that more radical then the senseless, racist murder perpetuated time and time again by police officers?
How is that more radical than our president’s recent actions that seem to be leading us toward a dictatorship which is an attack on the American Public?
Why is he making calls to his dictator buddy Putin on the same day who from what I’ve been told (Could be untrue cause I have not researched it) has modified his countries laws to remain in power and has done so for decades now in Russia? What’s to stop our current president from doing the same?
I don't mean to talk about politics, I don't identify with any political party including 3rd parties. The division is real and I don't approve. Things are not cool right now. I’m doing my best to be physically and mentally prepared just like the boy scout I am at heart. The Scout motto is “Be Prepared”. I don't yet feel prepared but I feel now is the time to do so. I could be wrong, I surely don't wish to give in to the fear but I have to remain somewhat realistic and grounded in this 3rd dimension. The government could strike down hard on all of us at any moment. I’d rather have my shit together in case of emergency versus being caught off guard.
Things are heating up, I’m not sure the heck is happening. is this even real? Just in case things are about to get even crazier I encourage you to prepare yourself. This is one hell of a time to be alive and ultimately I believe we as a species will take this planet back one way or another. It’s only a matter of time and I intend to live to see that day we are all truly free.
I don't care what side of the political spectrum you’re on. You are a human being at your core and I think there is a deep calling in all of us to help one another. The government is not your friend. We the people have endured enough from our oppressors. Be ready for anything.
Cheers to the survival of the human race!