My mum told me that funerals are for the living. I think that gets forgotten. Perhaps people plan their own funerals so they can convey the last of their essence to loved ones. “I chose to have these songs played because they were important to me. A part of who I am. I want you to see who I was.”.

Me? I have similar feelings as you. I would like my ashes dumped in the river. I would like family and friends to have a barbecue in my memory. Good food, conversations. I don’t mind being an excuse to get people together. How could I? I’m dead.