Buzz Words and Why Rape Culture is a Myth

Ok. So this one is gonna be all serious.

Rape Culture.

It doesn’t exist.

Now, nobody reads this anyway, but just in case I suddenly have a giant influx of readers, many of the female ones are currently screaming at their screens. So, let me please preface this by saying that I do not condone rape, or sexual aggression in any form; towards anyone.

The strongest feminists will say that my preface is just evidence that what I will say is terrible. But, what are you gonna do?

Rape Culture is terminology created in the 70’s in reference to a society that condones rape, and other forms of sexual aggression. This is evidenced by TV, news, movies, literature….everything that seemingly shows that it is okay to “rape”.

Fast forward to now. When the internet and smartphones have made everything a talking point in moments. When anyone can make a meme in seconds to display their views. When we can take in as much political and social jargon as we please.

It’s the time of the Buzz Word.

Re-enter, Rape Culture. It never went away as an idea, but in recent years people have latched on to the term and ran with it. It’s all over the news, in books, in blogs, and littered across most of your Facebook pages.

Problem is, it was a buzz word even in the 70’s. Rape is rape. It’s a word that makes you cringe. The act of rape is deplorable to the highest degree. When you hear the word, your ears perk up, and you pay attention. The problem is, rape has a definition. Unless we are referring to the pillaging of villages, rape is forced intercourse. Slapping a waitress’ ass is not rape. Cat calling is not rape. In fact there is a giant list of things that are included in Rape Culture that aren’t rape, and only one that is…..Rape.

Now we have culture. Culture is a system of beliefs and ideas held collectively by a group. A group that works together for a purpose, generally a lifestyle. Now, put rape in front of that, and you have the biggest Buzz Word of all. An entire society working as one to rape woman.

This doesn’t exist. But it is really easy to pay attention. It’s the same reason why talking about children getting killed is seemingly far worse than anyone else getting killed. It’s the same reason why we pay attention when a major disaster strikes poor people, but pay very little attention when California is on fire every damn year.

There are things that our society have deemed the worst. Rape is a big one. And it is horrible! There is no arguing that. None.

But we are not a society that has designs on raping all of our woman. There is just a handful of men that do these things. Is cat calling bad? Yes. Is groping a girl on the street bad? Of-fucking-course.

Is it rape? No

Our society will latch on to something in the blink of an eye. Information is passed along at such an extreme rate, that even the brightest of us have a hard time discerning what is rhetoric, and what is true. That’s why the age of the buzz word is dangerous. It has created a lot of people that are willing to champion an idea that was fed to them through a social media feed like baby food.

On my own Facebook page, I recently posted a meme that I found funny. You can see it below.

I then had an old friend comment that they will be unfollowing me because it isn’t okay to post jokes about rape.

This is an old argument that has been attached by anyone who has ever had a serious opinion on any subject. You shouldn’t joke about rape, molestation, kiddy porn, dead babies, cancer, aids, abortion, miscarriage….the list goes fucking on. However, I wholeheartedly disagree. The bad things in life are precisely what need to be joked about. The harsh realities are what need light shed on them. The good times don’t need any help, they are doing well on their own. Humor takes the power away from that which can destroy us.

Humor saves us.

But some people don’t see it that way. Those are the people with their minds directly connected to the topic being joked about. Those are the folks that laugh like crazy when you joke about racial differences, and scream bloody murder when you make a joke about an aborted fetus.

Posting this meme doesn’t condone anything. If anything it is a humorous attack on an actual (probable) rapist.

This has gone on long enough, and probably lacking and unorganized. I’m sure many can poke holes in the ideas, and discredit each word with a well designed website article. But that is the point isn’t it? Evidence can be exchanged until we die, but a website or quote does not a society make. And, heaven forbid that the vitriol that is spouted on message boards and the like be taken for actual culture.

Our society is not the same as it was in the 70’s, and it is ever changing. We are not a single culture, but an amalgamation of 1000 different ones. There are bad people, and there are good. This is the way of it all. Giant strides have been made to change for the better, and further leaps are being made all the time. But utopia doesn’t exist and never will. There will always be the stomping down of some by the many. It can’t be helped.

And please, before anyone claims that bringing “Rape Culture” to the forefront of American minds is the cause for changes in perspective — no it isn’t. Protest has never been the catalyst for change. Society has a way of shifting ideals on its own, gradually. By the time any of you have begun to protest an idea, societal ideals have already begun to shift. Protest can speed up the process, and absolutely does…but it does not create a change, it only hastens the inevitable switch that was coming. But, we have gotten to a point in history where protest is dangerous, because it gets so easily applied to things that are irrelevant. Thus, we get ideas such as rape culture in the first place.

Another disclaimer: I in no way believe that people should stop protesting what they believe is wrong. I just think it is harder than ever to keep to the actual point.

But, when we live in a society where men have to prove that they aren’t rapists instead of being assumed as not, then there is a problem. Because, 99.9% of us aren’t, and we shouldn’t have to prove it. Condemn those that commit atrocities, and don’t combine them and the innocent into a “culture.”