Ever wanted to simply disappear? Sometimes I have this thought as I sit distant, clouded with apprehension and exhaustion. What if we could simply just watch the world go by? I would fog my view as I excitedly peered at the outside world. I could explore the depths of individuals as they blur through the stale air. Walking silently on the pavement, I could explore others faults and not have to worry about my own. City streets already give a sense of anonymity, flooded with people that have no regard for the masses encasing them. Despite this, eyes wander through the forest of fabric and color. Curiosity becomes a blessing and a curse of human nature. To be or not to be, that famous quote originated from the contemplation of suicide but applies to most aspects of my life. Should I be judged or judged others? Take the leap or stay safe? These questions echo through the chasms of mind as I slowly drift. The chaos starts fading as order trickles in.

Here is complete guide to becoming a true nobody.

First, all relationships must be destroyed. Yes, even the guy you accidentally pushed on the sidewalk. Start from distancing yourself from friends. This can be done by simply investing and spending time with yourself. People who you tend to spend time with portray who you are to others. This will make you stand out already which defeats the entire purpose. Now ties to your family must be thoroughly decimated. The people who shaped who you are is essentially who you want to isolate from. They have shaped your action that occurred in seconds or years. All of these people know to much about your character, tendencies, and interests to partake in your new and improved lifestyle.

Next, is tackling interests. Having certain interests also tie you to others with mutual passions. But most importantly it makes you unique. Talents such as these cause unnecessary attention and a search for approval. To be a nobody, you can’t possibly be different than others. Having that much pride with cause notice and admiration. You certainly can’t have that! The simplest way to decimate these steadfast parts of ourselves is by doing absolutely nothing. Start to consider living everyday exactly the same and go from there. See, this isn’t as hard as you thought it was. It is actually seemingly simple once you program your mind to a default-like state.

Now, you need to get rid of those ridiculous beliefs you hold so tightly too. You don’t need to start awkward conversations anymore and you certainly don’t need any morality. Having ideas like these forming in you head can affect others and form your character. To be a nobody, you must practice being subjective. Holding opinions can be dangerous and causes countless disagreements in the first place. Can’t you see how much everyday stress has disappeared? Having questions also can cause issues since the answers can influence your mindset. You simply will have to function using only your instinct. This isn’t as hard as you think once you enter a factual state of mind. You have already become so close to achieving the ideal life, don’t give up now!

Remember all of those days standing in front of the mirror? By achieving such a degree of anonymity, you essentially will get rid of any of these annoying habits. You won’t have to desperately seek approval anymore. Expressing yourself is also wasteful in your new lifestyle. Simply start small, but dressing in one color scheme. Then slowly work yourself toward a style of uniform and order. I know this step probably stirs panic as you eye your closet. Don’t worry, by transitioning into a state of dullness, you will save money and time. You can instead invest those assets into your mundane lifestyle. This lifestyle, as I said before, consists of watching and learning about humanity around you. While experiencing this educational feat, you also remove the struggles and annoyances of your own life. You won’t have to look in the mirror yearning for acceptance. Vanity is not important in a world of nonexistent prejudice.

Are you with me so far? I know it’s a lot but I believe you can do this. There is only one step and I consider it the easiest of them all. Most importantly, your identity must disappear permanently. You can do that, right? See, I told you this was easy. There is so much competitiveness in the world we live in today. It is so much better to be a nobody than a somebody facing the pressures of becoming even more than a somebody. So sit back and relax as you watch others trip and fall. Watch as they fight with the people in their lives, sometimes resulting in tears. Watch as they fail in their line of work. Watch as they receive criticism for their appearance and talents they thought they had. These pitiful people don’t even know what there missing. Who need beliefs, expression, talents, realationships, identities, characteristics, interests? They all lead to turmoil in the end, right?

You have now finished this step-by-step guide toward the ideal lifestyle in today’s world. Enjoy wallowing in your own bliss and thoughts. This process shouldn’t take more than a few years and is relatively painless. I hope you enjoy being a nobody if you successfully following these guidelines. Take pride in knowing that you were smarter than the individuals still suffering through everyday life.

Still want to take to take the step? I knew you would! I believe you can do this whether it takes months or years. Work hard at destroying these unnecessary aspects to your life and hopefully, I will never hear from you again.