Adventures in Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation: Day 5
The first of six weeks of treatment has come and gone, and since my original plans for this evening fell through, I guess I will go ahead and write down my thoughts at this point.
- I’ve been waiting to see if I would get headaches from this, because I am prone to migraines and it seems like having a giant robot woodpecker go to town on your head might be a trigger for them. I have been pleasantly surprised. If anything, the treatments are helping in that area. Earlier in the week, I was starting to feel headachey on the way into a treatment because I hadn’t eaten much that day, but after the treatment I felt fine (if still hungry). My head does hurt some right now, but that’s a reaction to parenting-related stress.
- Today marked the first of two increases in power (they start out lower than the strength they need so you can get used to the process). There was again a concern about discomfort, and I could definitely tell the power had increased, but I’m still fine. Jaw still clenching, eyeballs still doing whatever the hell it is they’re doing, but I’m fine.
- I don’t know if I feel like my depression is any better yet, but it’s only the first week, so I’m told that’s not abnormal. Also, as a friend of mine pointed out on Facebook, the beginning of the Trump administration is a hell of a time to be trying to tell if a treatment is helping my mental health.
Mood (Day 5): I don’t feel much different (if any) from when I started this series of articles, but that is supposedly not cause for concern. The earlier change in my meds put me a decent baseline, so it’s possible I won’t see a whole lot of difference until the end of the process. I feel confident saying that I’m not much improved yet because I got a call from my kid’s school today about a disciplinary matter and it wrecked my whole afternoon and evening, and I continued my usual trend of turning that into feelings of despair and the futility of ever trying to have recreational plans. Intellectually I know that’s not healthy and it’s not true, but that’s where my brain goes. I am hoping that through TMS I will become less prone to that sort of thing.