May,2019
The workplace can be psychological threshold of critical feedback, abrupt colleagues and sometimes micro managing supervisors.Also the workplace consists of different personalities who all have different ways of dealing with situations.In response, we all wear what CBC workplace columnist Jennifer Newman calls “psychological armour” to work.
There are certain defensive mechanisms that we armour ourselves with to deal with different scenarios.
They include:
Denial
That’s when one refuses to accept a fact about themselves or their behavior even with feedback they get, they might act like they didn’t even hear the feedback or it’s a non issue.
Imagine that you and your team are working on a large project together. The deadline is closing in, and you still have a lot of work left to accomplish, in fact, that several of your team members have expressed concerns about whether or not you’ll make it over the finish line.
Every time they show even a shred of doubt you quickly reply with a seemingly nonchalant, “, I’m not worried. That’s not going to happen.” Sure, you could call that positive thinking. But really, it’s a defense mechanism we all know as denial .
Denial is more than just avoiding a potentially threatening thought or circumstance,it involves vehemently denying the fact that it even exists. There’s no way that your team could miss the deadline . It’s not even a possibility.
Displacement
It involves taking one’s feelings on a subject out on another, unrelated subject that is less threatening.
If they’re angry at the boss and unable to talk about it out of fear of losing their job or something like that, they might take it out on the family.
If you rely on displacement as a defense mechanism, anyone who crosses your path is going to wish they hadn’t. You may become unjustifiably angry with your direct reports, or even snap at your innocent colleagues. Put simply, you’ll channel all of your frustration and negative emotions into the totally wrong target, all because directing those feelings at your boss would’ve meant consequences for you.
Intellectualization
That’s used when a worker insists on analyzing a situation to death, rather than make a decision and they actually know the right direction but spend time pouring over minute details.
Undoing
Rather than apologize, some workers will try to use a defense mechanism called undoing; they try to undo the mistake.
They’ll be shown the error and talk about all the factors that went into how the error was made and it sounds like excuses but it’s actually the effort to undo the mistake.Others that actually work in favor.
Another case of undoing is,attempting to backpedal a negative behavior with a lot of positives (i.e. saying something rude to a co-worker and then showering him with compliments the rest of the afternoon).
Avoidance
Whenever there’s something that you don’t want to deal with, it often seems easiest to just avoid it entirely.
Procrastination is the most common form of avoidance in the workplace ,you keep yourself away from a potentially negative scenario by continuing to push it further down the line.
However,avoidance in the workplace extends beyond your tasks and into your relationships as well.
For example, maybe you’ve been strategically planning your coffee refills so you don’t have to run into that colleague you had a disagreement with in the break room.
Here’s the major problem with avoidance: things don’t go away just because you ignore them. That assignment will still need to get done. That conflict with that co-worker will need to be resolved eventually.
Projection
Projection it’s a person’s thought or emotion about another person, place or thing is too troubling to admit, and so, that thought or emotion is attributed to originate from that other person, place or thing. For example: “My boss hates me”, when it is actually the speaker who hates. A variation on the theme of Projection is known as “Externalization”. In Externalization, you blame others for your problems rather than owning up to any role you may play in causing them.
Regression
Regression involves dealing with unpleasant events by reverting to patterns of behavior found earlier in development. For example, an employee who has just been fired may cry or sulk in response.
Rationalization
Rationalization is explaining away an unacceptable behavior in a way that superficially makes sense, but actually avoids the true explanation for the behavior.
Let’s go back to our example of missing a deadline for your team project. Admitting that you didn’t get it done on time because you started too late can sting.
You know what’s way easier? To say that you missed that deadline because another team was late getting you what you needed. Or your computer crashed. Or someone drank all of the coffee again. Or all of the above. Taking an honest look at your own faults and acknowledging how you’ve contributed to your downfall is never easy
Acting out
Acting out refers to the act of engaging in actions rather than reflecting upon internal feelings. Someone who acts out may react to a fight by immediately packing up his or her belongings or storming out of the room, as opposed to thinking about the reasons for the argument.
Affiliation
Affiliation is when someone turns to other people for support.This person routinely calls on co-workers, family members and friends to rally behind him. Their support gives this person strength.
Humor
Humor involves pointing out the funny or ironic aspects of a situation in order to deal with it. These people often employ self-deprecating humor or poke fun at others to cope with inadequacy.
Compartmentalization
Segregating different thoughts or portions of your life (i.e. shutting out any personal problems while you’re at work).
How to deal with own defensive mechanisms
Find someone you trust on your team or in your office that can hold you accountable and identify when they see you putting your guard up. This should be someone who can, in the heat of the moment, direct your attention to the fact that you’re displacing your frustration or avoiding your to-do list.
Behaviors can become habit-forming. Pay close attention to how you act when you are faced with emotional dilemmas.
Embracing your emotions can be quite liberating. No one is perfect, and no one should aspire to be.Unfortunate situations happen and trust that it is ok to feel bad when they do.
How to deal with common defensive behavior as managers
Improve employee-manager relations by communicating openly, staying positive, respecting employees and giving them room to grow.
Share how the defensive behavior affects you as the manager. For instance, it might be helpful to say something along the lines of, “I know it’s hard to hear critical things, but it is just as hard for me to give criticism. Especially when I feel misinterpreted. I really do not want to hurt your feelings.”
Use positive language, and focus on ways to solve problems, not the problems themselves. Remember, defensiveness is the brain’s way of defending itself against attack. It is a survival mechanism built into the brain, according to “Psychology Today” magazine experts. But there are some ways around the brain’s reaction to criticism.
In short, look on the bright side.
Get employees involved. Initiate a dialogue with the employee that allows her to think of her own ways to improve her performance. Then ask employees to make a list of improvement goals for themselves individually.
Also, according to “Psychology Today,” the best way to change a behavior is to focus on the changing, not what needs to be changed.Allow the employee to evaluate their own performance based on the goals they made for themselves.Allowing the employee to assess their own performance, along with using a positive attitude, can greatly decrease the defensive behavior. Someone who is defensive about criticism will likely not be if they are not allowed to critique themselves.
So the key to working around this is to find a way to make the person feel safe. That means finding ways to signal that things are fine overall and that the problems aren’t earth-shattering ones. If you establish a basic sense of safety, the person won’t feel they have to defend themselves and can instead hear what you’re saying or doing what you do as a coping mechanism.
Written by Edna Omol.
For feedback
Email :ednaomol@gmail.com
Helpful Sites:
Josalin Mitchell (2017) How to deal with Defensive Employee Behavior.Retrieved from https://bizfluent.com/how-5889877-deal-defensive-employee-behavior.html
Kat Boogaard(2019). Are these defensive mechanisms preventing you from being productive? Retrieved from https://blog.trello.com/common-defense-mechanisms-preventing-productivity
Jennifer Newman(2017) .Defensive mechanisms in the workplace .Retrieved from https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/british-columbia/jennifer-newman-defence-mechanisms-in-the-workplace-1.4154435
Everyday Health (2017) .19 common defense mechanisms. Retrieved from https://www.everydayhealth.com/emotional-health/19-common-defense-mechanisms/
Mark Dombeck,PH.D . Coping strategies and defense mechanisms .Retrieved from https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/coping-strategies-and-defense-mechanisms-basic-and-intermediate-defenses/
