If you present yourself as you are and confidently own up to how you feel and what you think and believe to be true, you will be much more successful even if people disagree with you.
That’s because the main part of communication doesn’t happen in what you’re saying but in how you come off. Neither side can fully explain it or even be aware of it, but people have a great radar to sense when something is off.
So if you don’t expose the elephant in the room, your vibe will and it’ll be much more uncomfortable and painful for everyone.
That’s why you see people avoiding the truth, beating around the bush for as long as they can until something either implodes or they finally give in and speak the truth, nervously giggling and untensing as what should have been released much earlier gets released.
The same goes for self-honesty.
People lie to themselves all the time, all day long.
Everyone has at least one enormous elephant-shapped cloud hanging above their heads that they avoid eye contact with. They try 1000 other ways to deal with their issues instead of going for the obvious one.
Be honest about what’s off. Take advantage of the fact that human intuition is so good at sensing that something has to be fixed.
Are you happy on a day to day basis? Yes or no and why not? Do you feel good around the people in your life and about what you do and how well you do it and the person you’ve chosen to be, the way you seem to be headed?
Shine a VMA-sized spotlight on what you know is frail and deficient and scientifically, ruthlessly figure out how to best deal with it. Act as if you were hired as a management consultant for your life. Think about what advice you’d give someone in your position.
It is guaranteed to be ugly and painful no matter what and it’s only going to get uglier and more painful. What you fear is the case is already the case so you might as well face it head on.
If you wait any longer, you’ll just waste more time not being great.