Living | Loving
C. S. Lewis wrote:
To love at all is to be vulnerable.
Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken.
If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness.
But in that casket — safe, dark, motionless, airless — it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.
So much of human suffering is a result of a thwarted desire — need — for love. It is not surprising that people might try the opposite tactic: If you make yourself impervious to love, you will never be upset that none of it ever comes your way. But to deny oneself of a fundamental emotion of life is akin to living a shadow life — it all looks and sounds correct, but at its core, there is a sorrow and emptiness that is impossible to deny.
Lewis’ thoughts are a clarion call to open oneself up to love. Vulnerability is perhaps the most frightening aspect of the experience. So many in therapy protect themselves as a way of avoiding hurt and pain with the result of ironically experiencing more of it.
Perhaps it is that to be human, to live, is to love, and there can be no real escape from this?
Originally published at www.edwintantherapy.com.