K-Dog and Crystal can’t come to class today, they’re picking cotton
This post is long overdue. Apologies. I’ve now been in Shihezi for 2 and a half months. We finished the first quarter and are already halfway through the second. Only 4 more weeks until the end of the semester! I can’t believe how fast time has gone! I still kind of feel like I just got here.
Unfortunately, there haven’t been any more long breaks to do more exploring of Xinjiang. In fact, for all of October we actually had class 6 days a week — we had to make up classes on Saturdays because of the 2 week fall break. That was fun. So this post isn’t full of wild stories from the road, but it’s about teaching, students and life at Shihezi University. It may not be as exciting as hitchhiking across Northern Xinjiang, but I’ve sure found it entertaining.
I think the last time I posted about teaching was back in week 1. Woah, that was a while ago. I’ve come a long way since then. I finally know how to make somewhat coherent, interesting, and challenging lesson plans. I’ve found ways to make my students laugh and even start to think for themselves (?!?!!). Teaching is actually surprisingly challenging. Never realized just how much time and energy goes into creating lessons plans, carrying them out and then grading afterwards. And remembering the names!! Holy nuts.
Back in September I shared some of my favorite student names. I have students choose English names in hopes of making it easier to remember who is who. I let them pick their names by themselves, but if they need help I help them brainstorm some ones. I’m pretty sure I have the full cast of Friends characters in each of my grad student classes (Rachel, Monica, Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, and Joey — they LOVE this show here). I also have at least 2 girls with the name Daisy, Spring, Alice, and Summer in each class. For boys, they love the names Tom, Steve, and John. Actually, one of my favorite grad students from last semester had the name John. There was also a girl in the class named Joan and whenever I called her name for attendence John would stand up and wave his hand and do a little dance saying, “I’m here! I’m here!” He was super funny and could NEVER distinguish Joan from John. Those students were also Marxist Philosophy majors — it exists. I know!! (so China).
I know you all liked reading the previous names I shared (Bling Bling Little Star, Quiet boy named Sue, Rogue, Panda). Here’s some more:
- K-Dog
- Snore
- Mariah Legend
- John Rorbot
- August Rush
- Beyonce
- Narcissus
- Fish
I love the names they choose. You can choose your favorite. I’m still a big fan of Bling Bling and Quiet boy named Sue. Seriously where do they come up with these names??
Anyways, let’s talk about class. I teach 3 classes of Sophomore English majors. About 20 kids per class. I have them for the whole semester (16 weeks in total). I also teach graduate students of all majors — Law, microbiology, Chemical Engineering, Marxist Philosophy (!!!!!!), veternarians, plant protection, urban development, etc. These classes are super diverse — they typically have between 40 and 50 students (although one class last week had 75!!!!?!!!?!). And there is a HUGE range of ability — some students can carry on pretty sophisticated conversations while others can barely introduce themselves. Their classes are only half a semester so I only have 8 classes with them. This makes for quite the challenge.
I must say, classes are pretty entertaining. Each day, there is at least one interesting/comical thing. It definitely keeps class fun.
I think the novelty of having a foreign teacher is finally starting to wear off. I only catch a couple of my students taking not-so-sly pictures of me now. And only rarely do they appear on social media. Ricky got a good post the other day though (check out the picture on the left) — Translation: “Our foreign teacher, from London, graduated from Columbia University, fashion model figure, looking from the side, his nose covers/blocks half of his face [aka big nose]! Someone come save me…😍”
At the beginning, it was like we were rockstars. Students were always taking pictures OF us and/or asking to take pictures WITH us. Don’t even get me started about my cowboy boots…The first time I wore them to class everyone whipped out their phones to take pictures of them. Even a rando in the elevator took a picture!
While we’re on the subject of beginnings, when I first met my students I got all of the good questions: Age, religion, boyfriend, salary etc. There are no secrets here. All of my students think I am too young to be a teacher. One kid thought I was 16! I know I look young, but Come ON! When I show a picture of my family there is a unanimous consensus that Molly looks older (boo).
I’ve had a lot of funny interactions and responses in my class. Some of these might be due to translation issues and others due to cultural differences. Either way, these kids always make me laugh. I had a grad student who said his favorite hobby was “funky dancing, really funky.” Another’s hobby was “making many girlfriends.” I had a grad student who said a fun fact about himself was that he “killed a fly on [his] face yesterday.” Another grad student said his fun fact was that he “sometimes uses toothpaste as face cleanser.” Finally, another boy said he likes to “sleep read.”
In one sophomore class, each person responded to the prompt: “If you could only bring one item to a deserted island, what would you bring.” We then cut the class’s list down to the top 5 items. This was a blood bath. The debate got heated. In one of the classes (see picture on the left), the top five items were: boat, water, knife, (boy)friend/handyman, and food. Dog was a close #6 and nearly made the top 5. This was a heavily contested item. Some said the dog would just be another mouth to feed and didn’t bring many benefits. Others said the dog offered spiritual comfort and could help you find food on the island. Worst comes to worst you could always eat the dog. Wow. The survival book also made it surprisingly far on the list. Wifi was another contested subject. The (boy)friend/handyman was a compromise between the female majority and male minority of the class. These kids really make me laugh sometimes.
I’ve also gotten entertaining notes/messages from my students. Check out the one above! I got this one during the first week of classes. This kid really wants an A….and really needs some English help. Hopefully his English improved after my class. I guess it’s kind of sweet though? I still think more creepy…
During one grad class a student came up and gave me a piece of paper to excuse her classmates from class:
K-Dog and Crystal. They pick the cottons for their experiments today.
So Central Asia right? Grad students can’t come to class because they are picking cotton. I’m saving that excuse note.
There have also been some weird things that have gone down in class:
- On 3 different occasions students have clipped their nails in the middle of class
- Students spit in the middle of the classroom during the middle of class (too many instances to count)
- 3 boys snuggling in the back of my grad student class (once)
- English office rescheduled my class to be held in a bathroom (once — and hopefully never again ha!)
There have been funny things, weird things, and even some disturbing/sad things that have come up in class. For example, we were discussing family stories in my sophomore class and one girl shared that when she was born her dad tried to throw her into a river because she was a girl. Instead she was shipped her off to her aunt and uncle’s house for them to raise her so that her real parents could have a son. This girl didn’t realize who her real parents were until she was in middle school. She told this story like it was a comedy though. The students never cease to amaze me.
Now that I’ve been teaching for over a quarter now, I’ve picked up some handy lessons I thought I’d share with you:
- Dark colored clothing does not mix well with chalk — my entire wardrobe is stained white.
- Flip flops are prohibited in the library — apparently they are too noisy? But my cowboy boots are ok…
- Students are overly generous. On Rosh Hashana I asked a student where I could find honey and she came in the next day with a 2kg jar of honey.
- Avoid the bathrooms especially at the end of the day — they stank.
- Again, beware manholes (see previous blog post).
I will finish this post with a story that I hope demonstrates how much I’m starting to get settled in here:
One of the first things I did when I got to Shihezi was apply for a library card. Yep, I’m still a nerd! I dropped off a passport sized photo and 10元 and they said to come back in a week. Let’s just say their estimated 1 week deadline was about as accurate (and fast) as our expedited visa forms. I went back week after week to pick up the card and was repeatedly told that it wasn’t ready. Finally on my 4th try, about a month after I applied for the card, I was told it was ready! Woohoo! The clerk took out a stack of cards and started flipping through trying to find mine. She ended up taking out card #121430 (see picture above/on the left) and gave it to me.
“这是你的 (This is you right?)”
“不是。我不是中国人. (Umm…noo. I’m not Chinese).”
Are you kidding? Can you see the picture? This lady is obviously Chinese. And I’m…not. The clerk’s boss came over and smacked her on the head saying something like “This is a white girl. Her hair is yellow.” In the end, I finally received my real card. I can honestly say this is the first and only time I’ve been mistaken for a Chinese person. I think that means I’m starting to fit in…
That’s about all I have for now. I promise I’ll try to post more regularly in the coming months. I want to give a shout out to all/any of my readers (hey Cannon swimmers!)—thanks for following. I miss you guys. Thanks for keeping in touch/Please email me!
khosh,
xx
