Things That Were Once Enjoyable and Now Are Not Thanks to People in Power with Penises

Asking “Who is Keyser Söze?”

Jell-o Pudding

JFK

Hugging it out, Ari Gold-style

American Beauty

Mocking Steven Seagal for being a loser in all the other ways he’s a loser

Mocking Charlie Sheen for being a loser in all the other ways he’s a loser

Maybe Pamela Adlon, I dunno

Pootie Tang

Bugsy

The song Brother Louie (Hot Chocolate Song) redone by Ian Lloyd of the Stories

Lex Luthor (though that’s really on Jesse Eisenberg, but he’s probably an okay dude in real life, I hope.)

Gold

Masturbation

(get that sweatshirt above at 0stees.com, if you really want to at this point and aren’t weeping)