I guess I would always speak out against racism. As far as any sexism directed at me personally, I think it depends on the situation. If someone’s being an obvious jerk, in a way that anyone watching could understand, I would always respond very strongly to that. And humor can be a great weapon. If you can make fun of the bad behavior in a way that makes others laugh, that’s the best! But the worst offenders are often very subtle, and explaining what has offended you can make you look thin-skinned, which doesn’t work to your advantage. So I’d say, where the workplace is concerned, women should pick their battles. Once, while working on story for a video role-playing game, a guy I was working with patted my stomach (in a big meeting) and said, “You’ve got a little bit of a tummy.” So, I patted his stomach and said, “I had a 9 and 1/2 pound baby. What’s your excuse?” Everyone in the room laughed, all of them men. But if the situation is scary, or might end your career instantly, you have to carefully consider what you say or do. There are a couple of guys I’ve worked with who would be dead, if I could kill with the power of my mind, but I’d be hard pressed to prove they meant to do anything. What do you do, in that case? It helps us all, when women speak out. But it also helps us, when women have great careers!
Thanks for sharing your experience!
Heddy Stern
11