A guide to respectfully getting what you want, using what you have.
Working together with others is the key to growth and development. Elder Mark Moore Jr has achieved great successes in church ministry due to his ability to engage in mutually respectful and beneficial negotiations with others. Here are a few key takeaways from his work in church ministry and communications, to help you become a stronger negotiator.
Identify the Problem You are Trying to Solve
Too often, people engage in negotiations without identifying a spectrum of needs. These needs arise from a certain set of problems that must be solved. Elder Mark Moore Jr notes how crucial it is that members in a negotiation know what their problems are and understand the scope of their problems.
But a problem is not necessary something negative. A problem can be striving to achieve a goal that has not yet been reached. The problem when trying to achieve pertain to how one will accomplish a certain set of goals.
One must be able to wrap words around their problem and describe its consequences. According to Elder Mark Moore Jr this gives other parties the chance to understand why negotiations are happening in the first place. It also can elicit empathy from other parties as they put themselves in another person’s shoes.
Next, one must prioritize all the little problems making up the big problem. It is unlikely that everyone will get what they want in a negotiation. As such, Elder Mark Moore Jr states one must know which problems are best left for another day, which are crucial to solve immediately, and which problems may solve themselves over time.
Determine the Best Possible Solutions
Who is involved in negotiations? One must know who may or may not hold the key to solving their problems (as described above). Often, people already know who they need to talk to, but they may not have examined all possible solutions.
Anyone engaging in negotiations ought to come from a position of strength, realizing that not one person or organization necessarily holds the key to solving their problems. Elder Mark Moore Jr says people that hone in on one person or organization to solve their problem often enter negotiations with unnecessary desperation.
State the Need with Clarity and Confidence
One must enter negotiations having rehearsed their message and requests. Participants generally have limited time and greatly appreciate “getting to the point” quickly and confidently. Elder Mark Moore Jr, a renowned communications expert, often advises peers to improve their ability to be confident and concise when stating their position and needs.
One should begin by asking for best case scenario and give ground as is appropriate. If participants properly prioritized their problems (as described above), then knowing where and when to give ground can be quite simple.
Those seeking to negotiate should at all times remain direct while inviting collaboration. Both sides in a negotiation are working together to come to consensus. It is a noble task that requires that both sides listen respectfully, validate one another’s perspective, and suggest alternative perspectives and solutions.
Not every negotiation will end in both parties getting what they want or in getting anything at all. However, according to Elder Mark Moore Jr a spirit of collaboration significantly increases one’s chances of getting what they want. Most importantly, it can radically improve one’s negotiating abilities for the next meeting.
Mark Moore is a Pastoral Assistant at Faith Covenant Church in Atlanta, Georgia. He is also CEO of The Moore Group. Mark’s passion for connecting and serving others has led him to become a mentor for digital communication, namely social media for churches.