Why Do Men Put So Little Effort Into Serious Dating?
Emma Lindsay
1K125

Dustin has a good point about location. Ask any real estate agent what’s most important. They’ll say “location, location, location.” If you wanted to buy sledding dogs would you go to Miami Florida? If you wanted to find surfers would you go to Minot North Dakota? No.

You’re hunting daddy material in San Francisco . . . probably not great hunting grounds. SF is known for a lot of things, if I were hunting for great entrepreneurs, hot programmers, banking gurus SF is the place to hunt . . . family centrism not so much. The surrounding bedroom communities should yield a little better results . . . once you escape the gravity of the commute range to SF your results will likely improve greatly.

Your hunting methods are not really so hot either. Whilst I was never into the bar scene, and never did on-line dating, nor even looking (I’ve been married since before the internet). Despite the claims of marketing, I would think finding Mr. Right probably doesn’t really happen online. I’ve always been under the impression that on-line dating is for finding Mr. Right-Now.

In my mind if you want to find daddy material, get out past Davis. There you’ll find bearded intellectuals, semi-pro athletes, cow-boys, what-ever flavor you like — but find a man working with children, little league, soccer, Scouting, teaching, gymnastics, theater, . . . that’s daddy-hood mecca.

I also believe the best place to meet good people is in college. There you’ll find people trying to better themselves.

The further you get out of the city and into the country the more family oriented the location tends to be. We went as far as to live out in the poison-oak country of the Sierra Nevada foot-hills. It’s another world as far as family values. There are probably 5 churches between me and the nearest Starbucks. None of the children have tattoos, are from broken homes, disrespect authority or adults. In other words, pop-culture is diminished and family culture is the rule here, not the other way around.

If you were to go the country route, you’d have to disregard just about every pop-culture— read false — preconception about country life, culture, and country folk. It’s kinda like falling off the edge of the earth. Out here, one is in touch with nature, feels the earth, the weather, the seasons . . . one is grounded — for better or worse — every day. Once this happens, when one becomes part of the natural world, maybe the other stuff never really mattered.

Show your support

Clapping shows how much you appreciated Michael Kelly’s story.