Dating Advice, Evolutionary Psychology
Why Understanding Male Biology is Crucial for Women in Dating.
Navigating the Dichotomy of Casual vs. Commitment. Know the secret, upgrade your dating life.
Men. We love good men. We appreciate what they do for us. They built this world and they help create life (a couple of minutes of activity on their part).
I have met great men in my life, and I am in a relationship with the best one. What I love most about men, is that they are not women. And in today’s world, this can be a sore point of contention. Blurring the lines between men and women is causing a decline in healthy relationships and overall human happiness. We are more alike than different, but the differences are substantial.
One of the many differences is rooted in our mating strategy. For long-term relationships, both sexes equally desire solid commitment with a high-quality partner. For short-term dating, there is a stark difference between how the two sexes approach their goal. The general consensus among Darwinian scientists is that
Males have ‘genetically’ evolved to be interested in short-term relationships and have a variety of fertile sexual partners. They also have lower standards for their casual hook ups.
For any given guy, there are many more women he is interested in casually sleeping with, than women he is interested in committing to and marrying. From an evolutionary standpoint, this adaptation in male behaviour ensured that genes got passed on quickly and our species survived.
Evolution compels women to be choosier as the burden of an involuntary pregnancy is primarily on the woman. One simple rendezvous with the wrong partner can leave a woman alone with a baby, unprotected in the wilderness.
This dichotomy in dating strategy poses a dilemma for modern women.
Men, very early on in their dating, will sort women into two rough categories :
- for casual fun
- for commitment
Women will often have no idea which category they have been put into.
Men will spin beautiful tales to gain sexual access and temporary entertainment.
An oblivious woman will date a man thinking she meets his long-term standards, while he’s only considering her for a short-term fling.
Too often and too quickly women end up giving themselves to a man that has not yet earned her, in hopes that intimacy will bring them closer together.
And it…sort of does...but it's a one-sided connection.
During sex, a woman releases a bunch of chemicals and hormones that chemically bond her to the man. So while she’s feeling more closer and connected to him than ever before, a totally different explosion of testosterone-fuelled chemical reactions is happening in his body.
Biology dictates that if the man isn’t emotionally connected to the woman before sex, he can’t wait to get rid of her after sex. Post nut clarity.
Men and women are biologically predisposed to behave differently in mate selection. Understanding this can avoid a lot of emotional pain for women.
It is beneficial to evaluate men with a sober and rational mind, not clouded by charming words and pretty promises.
Occasionally, it can be advantageous to view the world through the lens of the opposite gender. In a man’s world, a good time does not always equate to a long time.
