I have had similar misadventures, so reading this was something like a war flashback. You heartily deserved that beer and cuddle. I really dislike driving and didn’t get my own license until age 18 (most of my classmates got theirs at 16). Naturally, life has given me such gifts as 60-mile commutes to work and family that lives a 12-hour drive away. Just think of it this way: virtually anything else the car throws at you will feel like a cakewalk after this.
(Seriously though, start saving for a better car. A 13-year-old vehicle is just going to eat pile after pile of money for repairs the longer you keep it.)