Want to trade chocolate Labs for a week or two? Because mine not only climbs trees (we wish she wouldn’t — she fell out once and needed 17 stitches on a federal holiday, which was not cheap!) but, in partnership with the dearly departed Rosie the golden retriever, has killed 3.5 squirrels in the past two years (the 0.5 squirrel got away, but I’m betting it didn’t get far).
Last month she caught and killed a bird in midflight and I had to chase her around the yard and pry the bloody-feathered corpse out of her defiant jaws, so she is never allowed to catch anything ever again. Oddly, it’s been a few weeks since I saw a squirrel in our backyard — perhaps they finally got the message?
And YES TO VAGINA MASTIFFS! LMAO!