Who Said It : Chris Christie or Ignatius J. Reilly?

9 Quotes from either GOP candidate/New Jersey governor Chris Christie or Ignatius J. Reilly, character in A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole.

One loves New Orleans, the other New Jersey. One is a character from a remarkable work of fiction, the other is a real live flesh person.

But the differences seem to stop there: These two both call ’em like they seem ’em, even if how they seem ’em is pretty dickish; they’re complicated individuals with somewhat displaced passions (e.g., Doris Day movies and Iowa pig crates); and they both wear enormous pants.

Read the quotes below (totally out of context and curated to service a trivial agenda) and see if you can tell who said which phrases.

  1. “Is there any wonder why we are in such big trouble? Any question why the people don’t trust their government anymore, and demand a change?”
  2. “Dictatorship naturally arises out of democracy, and the most aggravated form of tyranny and slavery out of the most extreme liberty.”
  3. “Over the years, I have become very good at getting out of things I don’t want to do.”
  4. “I would rather die than be in the United States Senate.”
  5. “She spoke the truth, bluntly, directly, and without much varnish. I am her son.”
  6. “Sit down and shut up.”
  7. “Oh shut up your little pussymouth, you mongoloid.”
  8. “I am an anachronism. People realize this and resent it.
  9. “I would never fall asleep during a Springsteen show.”

ANSWERS!

Let’s see how you did.

  1. Christie. Don’t trust the government! Trust me.
  2. Reilly. This one is indeed Reilly, though Christie did once lament the fact that New Jersey was not a dictatorship.
  3. Reilly. To be fair, Ignatius was probably much lazier than Christie.
  4. Christie. Drama queen!
  5. Christie. Speaking about his own mother. Ignatius’s relationship with his mom was…a little complicated.
  6. Christie. He LOVES to yell at people who don’t like him.
  7. Reilly. Thank good grief. Ignatius wins the worse-off.
  8. Reilly. Of course, judging by his stance on a marijuana laws and minimum wage, Christie doesn’t really seem of his time either.
  9. Christie. This one is obviously Christie and not Reilly, but it’s really very stupid.