The Life of a Twitter Phony

Twitter was never my thing. When it was cool and fresh, and I was considered lame for not having an account, I thought it was pretty unnecessary. But, alas, I (of course) gave into the pressures of my peers and was henceforth known only as @ellzoneil.

Believe you me — I know that’s the absolute worst thing in the entire world. And to make the worst even a little more unbearable, no one calls me Ellz. No. One. (My sister, Katie, who apparently is quite often referred to as Katez, used the handle first, and as the younger sister, it was my duty and my right to steal the name. And as the older sister, she should expect to have absolutely nothing of her own. Also, for the record, no one calls her Katez.)

So now I’m stuck with this stupid, stupid Twitter handle for God knows how long. The rest of my life? Probably. Who’s to say?

Anyway, (sorry for the rant lol — I just love a good background story) I don’t like Twitter. I get it, though. Great marketing, if you know how to use it correctly (here’s looking at you, Taco Bell). And sure, some celebrities really know how to work with 140 characters and crack up their fans. Here’s the thing — I’m no Anna Kendrick, Queen of Comedy, and I definitely don’t know how to market a Triple Steak Burrito like the guy running the Taco Bell Twitter account. Maybe I just don’t have much to say, which could easily be the case, because, as many of you have probably learned, I would rather talk about musicals 24/7 than anything else on the planet.

For this reason, I struggled with the Twitter assignment. I found myself thinking, “I CANNOT forget to tweet,” which is a horrible reminder for someone like me. I obviously forgot. I tried to be the fun PR student who has real opinions on the latest campaign or the biggest crisis in the world of public relations. I quickly realized I was kidding myself. I will forever be the girl who, if it was socially acceptable, would only spit out random facts or my deepest thoughts on the latest in Broadway news and gossip. Maybe @ellzoneil ruined me for life. Probably. Thanks, Katez.

This picture was my most successful tweet to date. Still unsure about why I chose to stand like that.
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