Blame the Parents

Photo by Hayes Potter on Unsplash

It was with sheer desperation that Ally called the Life Coach.

“I can’t make friends,” she blurted down the phone as soon as her call was answered.

“You can’t make friends?”

“No matter how hard I try, no matter how many times I strike up conversation, no matter how kind or funny or interesting I try to be, I simply can’t make friends. People can’t get away from me quick enough.”

“Well, you’ve called the right person. With my help, you’ll have some brand new friends in no time at all.”

“Really? Oh, that would be brilliant.”

“First things first — tell me your name.”


“And your surname?”


The Life Coach frowns. “Do you tend to go by Alexandra or by Ally?”

“Ally, usually.”

“Ally Tosis?”

“That’s right.”

“Oh, you poor thing. Your parents never gave you a chance, did they?”

“What do you mean?”

“Tell me, Ally — how often do you brush your teeth?”

“Not sure why it’s relevant but… once every few days, if I remember.”

“Just as I thought. Meet me at the dentist at 10 AM tomorrow and we’ll get this whole stinking thing sorted out.”