Welcoming Ellis
I’ve got some exciting news, I’m changing my name to Ellis and my pronouns to they/them. This is because I’m Non-Binary. Please update my name in your phone books and how you refer to me and shift my pronouns to they/them. I know this will be strange for a while, but the more you use it the easier it will become, I promise!
This has come after a very personal journey to understand my gender and how I want to show up in the world. I don’t feel that I want to share all of that journey now, but I want to use the platform and privilege I’ve got to do some education on trans rights and what it means to be non-binary in the world today.
I also want to give massive thanks to some people who have supported me on my journey to get here, your overwhelming support and acceptance has made this journey much easier for me than for lots of people. Lou — for accepting me as I am and your unwavering championing of me. My siblings who have told me how much they love me and been there from the beginning and my wider friends and family who have supported this transition with the excitement and care I needed.
Whilst I’ve had lots of support on my personal journey, it’s been hard to grapple with my gender in a climate of transphobia. Whether this is the government consulting on my existence again, famous authors claiming I don’t exist, seeing transphobic stickers put up around Glasgow, or the disproportionate levels of violence that trans people experience, particularly trans people of colour. In sharing this I’m not looking for support, curiosity or even celebration, but I’d like people to take actions around supporting trans rights, which are under continual threat in the UK. It’s transgender awareness week, so it could be sharing a positive story about trans people, or supporting some of the amazing trans organisations Mermaids, LGBT Youth Scotland.
I’ve put some more information below, that might help you understand if you’re new to some of these concepts.
Help, I’m confused, what do you mean by gender!
I think this diagram below, is a good definition of gender and some other definitions around gender.
It came from this website here Non- Binary Identities 101t
I’m still confused, are you transgender?
Yes, I would identify as trans* as I don’t identify with the gender that I was assigned at birth. Not all Non-Binary people do identify as trans, but this feels like a label that works for me.
What does it mean to be non-binary? Does it just mean you are dressing more androgynously?
Being non-binary is more than how you dress. It’s about trying to exist outside of the gender binary or moving fluidly between and through it. In terms of clothes, it could mean some days dressing more masculine, some days more feminine, and some days more androgynous.This website has a helpful definition.
What are pronouns?
Pronouns are what we use to identify people’s gender in speech and language, commonly used pronouns are:
He/him
She/her
They/Them
Ze/Zir
This is the best article I’ve seen recently about they/them pronouns https://www.theguardian.com/world/2020/jan/14/janelle-monae-non-binary-pronouns-they-them
What can I do to support you or other trans people?
Use my/others new names and the pronouns they ask you to use (for me this is they/them) and do some reading and understand some of the issues. Don’t be upset when I or someone else corrects you, apologise and move on.
Where can I find more information?
Here are some links…
Stonewall Q and A, The truth about trans
Stonewall video about being non-binary
Video about being non-binary and haircuts!
What does non-binary mean? Definition after Sam Smith comes out as genderqueer
5 Non-Binary People Explain What “Non-Binary” Means To Them | Tinder — video
Books
Trans Like me, CN Lester
Gender a graphic guide
Podcast
This podcast was really great in explaining all things NB, each episode is only 30 mins and its friendly and fun! NB: My non-binary life
Film — Disclosure on Netflix, is an amazing documentary about the representation of trans people in the media, definitely worth watching
What can I do to support trans rights?
● Support trans rights in conversations, and challenge any transphobia
Donate to:
○ LGBT Youth Scotland — who run great trans support groups for young people
○ LGBT Health and Wellbeing — who support the LGBT community in Scotland, and run gender support groups
○ Mermaids — who support trans young people
