Relieving Emotional Suffering — Stop Your Second Darts

My recent non-fiction reading turned towards neuroscience and better understanding the human brain. I highly recommend “How Emotions are Made” (2017) by Lisa Barrett. The book presents an accessible summary of current research and thinking on the neuroscience of emotions. Her “Theory of Constructed Emotion,” turns the classical view of emotions as universal or hardwired in our genes on its head. Instead, the neuroscience research shows that emotions are learned associations constructed within our brains based on our experiences.
Your moment-to-moment experience may feel like one discrete mental state followed by another, like beads on a string, but … your brain activity is continuous throughout intrinsic, core networks. Your experiences might seem to be triggered by the world outside the skull, but they’re formed in a storm of prediction and correction. Ironically, each of us has a brain that creates a mind that misunderstands itself. [p287]
My only quibble is that it was difficult to figure out how one might more directly translate the research into improving one’s everyday life.
Then, I was steered towards an earlier book, “Buddha’s Brain” (2009) by Rick Hanson, which attempts to view modern neuroscience through the lens of Buddhism and I found the following passage:
To borrow an expression from the Buddha, inescapable physical or mental discomfort is the “first dart” of existence. As long as you live and love, some of those darts will come your way.
First darts are unpleasant to be sure. But then we add our reactions to them. These reactions are “second darts” — the ones we throw ourselves. Most of our suffering comes from second darts. [p50]
This was actionable, now when I am getting upset, I find myself :
- pausing my brain more;
- saying to myself “second dart!”;
- reminding myself that there is no neuroscientific basis for any particular emotional response to any particular thing; and
- trying to stop stabbing myself with the second dart
What have you tried to stop the self-inflicted pain of your second darts?
(Image: TuYyo/Shutterstock.com)
