You can love someone (though I admit, I’m not sure what that word means anymore) and let them be in, but not participate in, your group. Like, we don’t let six year olds vote. But you’ve inherently put them in a lesser position than everyone else in your group. That’s fine, esp. if you are upfront about it, but don’t pretend that it isn’t treating someone radically differently and recognizing them as a different category of person (i.e. as we recognize children).
It really is simple: you have a religious group. You can worship how you choose. You can believe how you choose. If you don’t believe gay people can have particular roles in your church, that’s fine. That’s perfectly legal. Go on your merry little way.
But don’t for one second pretend that you are “inclusive” or that you “love everybody.” You don’t. You don’t have to. You simply do not want to be seen as “the bad guy…” etc. But here’s the thing: you can’t control how people see you. You want people to like you, to think you’re godly, to join your church. People don’t. They see you as a bigot because you behave like one. Fiddling with language (“we love x group, we just don’t treat x group the same way we treat everyone else”) is just mealy-mouthed nonsense.