PinnedEmily CerritoinGreener Pastures MagazineI Am a Local Politician and I Need to Ask You For Money. Again.I am eternally in crisisJul 112Jul 112
Emily CerritoinGreener Pastures MagazineA Day In The Life of My Handsome, Tortured StalkerBecause predation is chill when it’s at the hands of someone sexySep 131Sep 131
Emily CerritoinThe HavenHow To Stand With Palestine and Also Have a Big NoseSincerely, your Friendly Neighborhood JewJun 27Jun 27
Emily CerritoinThe HavenInterview With a Potential Employer If They Were My New Date, Jacob from HingeThe job market is the new dating scene and I’m your Manic Pixie Dream Girl. Hire me!Jun 19Jun 19
Emily CerritoinGreener Pastures MagazineIs This Production Team Just Sloppy, or Is There an Active Shooter Outside?Every American’s worst nightmare, next to being an audience member at a game show tapingMay 9May 9
Emily CerritoinThe HavenVoluntary Disclosures, Love Your Future EmployerHey there, unqualified plebeian. Thanks SO much for taking time out of your day to apply to this job you won’t get. Before we reject you…Mar 17Mar 17
Emily CerritoDid I Embarrass Myself by Having Too Much Fun at the Weed Lounge?There is a certain amount of fun that is appropriate to have as an adult in a public setting. You know, the kind of fun where said adult…Mar 17Mar 17