How to Clean When You’re Depressed

My name is Emily and I’ve had depression since I was five years old. I’m 45 now and I think it’s fair to say I’ve got some experience with the bluest blues. One thing that people like me struggle with the most is keeping the house clean. I don’t mean perfect, I mean clean enough to be safe and sanitary for you and your loved ones. Here’s what I do to keep things neat when the depression takes over life. I hope this helps some of you, know you’re not alone friends.

First Off, Stop the Shame

Depression affects over 264 million people worldwide according to the World Health Organization. That works out 1 out of every 27 people. If you don’t have depression yourself, you probably know someone who does. So, before we go any further, let’s stop shaming people for having a life-threatening disease.

One of the most common depression symptoms is an inability to do basic tasks like shower, sleep, eat regularly, and clean the house. When the choice comes down to choosing between feeding the family and cleaning the toilet, everyone would feed their family first. This is a very real choice that people with depression have to make daily. So, if you’ve been one of those folks that looks down their nose at people with messy houses maybe give them a hand instead of judging. They may just be unable to make it happen.

So, Things Are a Mess

Ok, the house is a wreck and you’re still depressed. The dishes are a biohazard, the bathroom requires rubber boots to safely navigate, there’s piles of laundry, and there may be a raccoon living in the back room by now. You don’t know. You haven’t been able to open that door in weeks. It’s going to be ok, we got this. However bad it is, it can be done. It’s going to take a little time, some big trash bags, and a lot of breaks.

Supplies

Before we even start worrying about the stuff we have to do, let’s make sure you’ve got the things that are going to make this easier. Here’s my list: gloves, big trash bags, paper plates, surface cleaner of choice, bleach, toilet bowl cleaner, rags, baking soda, paper towels, and laundry soap. I’m assuming you have a vacuum and mop, if not borrow or grab those as well. If there’s anything you love to clean with grab that, there’s no wrong answers here. These are just the things I use.

Wait, Paper Plates?

Yes. And get disposable cutlery if you want, too. You’re about to use your limited energy up, you aren’t going to have the energy to clean and cook. So grab some frozen dinners and put them on paper plates. This is about survival. If you’re already at the paper plate place, you know this. If not, welcome. For all the environmentally aware folks (and I hope you’re out there) paper plates can be easily recycled, burned, or used for mulch in your garden.

Put Your Cleaning Crown On

Start by setting the mood. This is a chore, but it can still be enjoyable. If you live with people, either recruit them to help you or kick them out while you clean. Focus is hard enough without distractions. Put some music on if that makes you feel good, put on an awesome outfit (I personally have found great joy in cleaning in heels and a crown), and make this the occasion it is. You are about to start making your space livable again.

Prepare yourself mentally. You are about to be confronted with things you think you should keep, messes that make you feel guilty, and the obvious gross stuff. Get ready for it, find your strength. You can do this.

Choose a Method, Then Follow It

The two best methods are room by room and chore by chore. I’ll go through each. The important thing is to keep to the method you’ve chosen until you’re done. This is war. You against this colossal mess. You must be resolute. Take no prisoners. Everything is about to become either clean or trash.

Room by Room

This method is exactly what it sounds like. You clean each room and then move to the next. This is a great method if you have to clean over a course of several days. It’ll give you a little boost every time you walk into the rooms you’ve already cleaned as the days go by. If you've got helpers, this method can allow several people to work at once without getting in each other’s way.

If you choose this method, I suggest starting in the bathroom. It’s the room you’ll use at least a couple times a day and visiting it will remind you of how awesome you are. I suggest leaving the kitchen for last in this method. It tends to get used the most and dirty the fastest. Also, you’ll find dishes all over the house so leaving the dishes for the end just makes sense. When I’m using this method I usually do bathrooms, bedrooms, living room, kitchen. I’ll go more into detail in the next method as far as how-tos, they work with this method as well. Just use the chore list on each room.

Chore by Chore

This method works best if you’ve got a day (or two) to power through it all at once. In this method, you do all of one task at once. This is my favorite method. I start with trash and laundry. Two big bags follow me room to room as I gather all the laundry and trash. This is a crucial point where the lines between possessions and useless junk get blurred. Is it trash? Well, do you need it to survive? If the answer is no, it’s fair game. If the answer is yes, then keep it. Laundry gets put into the washer as soon as the bag is full enough for a load. As you continue through the day, keep switching laundry. When a load is done take the time to sit down and fold. Your body needs the rest. Watch a show while you fold or call a friend on speakerphone.

Then, dishes. Not washing them yet — that’s last — but gathering them into the kitchen. Next is surfaces. They all get sprayed down from one end of the house to the other, then go back to the beginning and wipe them off. While you’re doing surfaces, declutter. You’ve already taken out trash and laundry so what’s left should have a place. If it doesn’t, I would like to introduce you to the magic of containers. Put the clutter into a cute basket or bin. Clear surfaces are easier to look at and easier to clean.

Now floors. If you’ve got carpets sweep them first. Yes, use the broom to get the big stuff off and loosen dirt that’s stuck in. Sweep the stuff into a dustpan and put it in the trash. Then dust them generously with baking soda. Now move onto the hard floors. Sweep them and spray them down with cleaner. Don’t worry about getting them dirty by walking on them, you’ll wipe them later. This spray is just to loosen up stuff. Remember, they’re a little slippery. Be careful. Especially if you’ve worn heels.

Fill your bathtub with water and some bleach and put at least the bottom of the plastic shower curtain in the water/bleach. If you’ve got the energy put the whole thing in. Let it soak. Toilet bowl cleaner in the toilet. Let it soak. Now move into the kitchen while that all marinates. You’ve got a ton of dishes. Start with scraping off anything that won’t wash down the drain into the trash bag. Fill up one side of the sink (or a tub if you only have one) with hot, soapy water. Soak the worst ones. Sort the rest. Let that soak for a bit.

Now, vacuum up the baking soda on your carpets. Drain your tub and rinse the whole shower, tub, and curtain with the showerhead. Use the toilet scrubber to clean the toilet. Wipe down the sink and mirror. Mop the bathroom floor.

Now it’s time to wash the dishes. I like to imagine each piece of mess on each dish is a worry. I scrub those worrys down the drain. Bye, bills. See you later, fourth-grade mishap I can’t stop remembering. Adios, body image. Etc. When you’re done with them, give the floor another spray. Mop the floor.

You’re done. This is a triumph. You deserve take-out and for anyone you know to sing your praises. You deserve to take a nap. You are a superhero. Maybe take a shower in your newly cleaned bathroom. You may be a stinky superhero after all that.

Take Breaks, Lots of Them

I like to set a timer for 15 minutes. I work hard for a quarter-hour then I sit the heck down. You can set one for longer if you’ve got the energy. Just remember to take breaks. Drink water. Text a friend who will cheer you on. Have a snack. Check social media. Rest. Then get back to the mess. Pace yourself, this is hard work.

Throw Stuff Away or Give Stuff Away

If you only see a thing when you’re cleaning it, get rid of it. Got extra dishes? Donate them. Stuff just clutters up your space and makes it harder to clean. Release the need to hold onto things. If you feel like you might need it someday, put it in a box and store it.

Baskets and Containers Are Amazing

Clutter is hard on your mental health and makes it harder to clean. Get cute, cheap baskets with lids and put your clutter in them. Bonus, you can still be messy in the boxes and no one will see it — especially you. No one needs another guilt trigger and clutter is a big one for a lot of people. Second-hand stores, dollar stores, and online marketplaces are usually stocked with these types of things.

Ask For Help

I left this for last because it really is hard to ask for help when you’re depressed. But, here’s the thing, humans are social animals and we love to help each other. If you don’t have friends or family close enough to help in person, ask them to help you hire a cleaner. Your depression isn’t something you chose, it’s a thing that’s happening to you. Forgive yourself and ask the folks around you to help you conquer the messes. You deserve a clean house, and the people that love you want you to have one. Let them help you get a clean home.

It’s Ok to Fail

Maybe all you can do is read this article. Maybe you get some done and it gets messy the next day. Maybe this all sounds impossible. That’s ok, too. You’re still worthy of love and respect. A clean house isn’t an indication of a good person. I’ve known some really mean people with perfect houses, and some of the best folks I know will always have a messy house. This is just a guide in case you want one. Depression is a real thing, and it affects a lot of folks. No matter what you do, know that you’re loved by this fellow depressed person.