It has been almost ten months now. The day I said goodbye to my beloved and faithful companion was almost a year ago. I had not been prepared to express my worry, sadness, turbulence, joy, grief, yearning, fondness, growth, comfort and gratefulness. Until now.
Gabbi, my Golden Retreiver was the vibrancy that prompted my vigor. She was the elation obsorbed by my heart. She was the essence that equated my soul.
Although separated by time and space, we are one. Love bears no bound.
There will never be another Gabbi. She will always be the love that completes my longing. She was my ally, friendship and whole.
She taught me love, she taught me joy. She taught me to reflect my inner being so warm and tender, where all my worlds collide in perfection. She was there.
She was always there.
For anyone who loses a loved-one, a parent, a pet, a spouse or a friend. That day remains the greatest triumph, for I acknowleged brevity. None remains. I was stricken by the practicality of its measures, the decisions, the bed, the body, before I was seized by all of grief’s darkness. I called my parents. My brother came. Finally, the vet arrived with his assistant. And by the approving manner they approached my soaked blindness, I was consoled.
As the tears dried and the arrangements made, I will remain grateful. The love and perfection through the passing of a being so luminous. I am blessed.
To this day, she continues to demonstrate her guidance. Her love is felt. And one day, I will focus that love on another four-legged friend. Perhaps it will come as a spirited seven-week old Golden Retriever, just like Gabbi. Or perhaps, it will be the rescue of an abandoned companion, impeded. Until then, I relish the love that I learned, the gratitude of my greatest delight and the awe of an angel so pure. I am evermore, bewildered and undone.