01/13 Becoming someone else

“That’s the point: what you thought I was is the man I want to be.”

I got that quote from the latest episode of ‘Sherlock’. John told that as he had confessed something to Mary. I wrote ‘something’ so that I won’t get into spoiler territory, but back to that quote. That really is the point, isn’t it? The person we want to become is the persona we show to the people we love, or to those who we want to love us back.

Fake it till you make it, as some would say. We put our best effort just to make others take notice of us. We do stuff we don’t ordinarily do, like give gifts or travel great lengths (even getting lost) just to get that rare book. We push ourselves to the limit just to grant the desires of the people we love, to make them just a tiny bit happier.

Not only that, as we go deeper into their identity, we begin to like the things they like — you begin to listen to the artists they jam to, you begin to search and dream to go to the sceneries they want to see, you begin to hang out with the friends they have fun with. You slowly adapt yourself to them. There might be other reasons, like you already liking the artists they like to a certain extent, but liking them is the main cause of a sudden increase. (Believe me, I do know this. I already like Ed Sheeran and his songs, but once I knew she liked Ed so much, I came to like his songs about 20 percent more. More revenue for him, I guess?)

The people we love change us. This is what happens when we spend time with people we like and adore. Just like how the little prince liked a rose, even if that rose looked alike with all the other roses in the field, we begin to like people because we get to spend more time with them, allowing more of our cranial capacities to be alloted to them. (Hence, the pickup line Aren’t you tired? Because you have kept on running on my mind.)

My takeaway from this? When we begin to like or love someone, we change towards their likes and dislikes, that’s why we have to make sure that the people we choose to love would make us change to be better people. I am sure blessed that the people I like, love and adore are good people, and as I love them more, I become better.

I’m not telling you to choose the people you love, (I, for one, believe that my purpose here on Earth is to love God and love people) it’s just that, once we choose to become bonkers for someone, you have to be sure that this person is someone who can bring out the best in you. One of the things to know that is to do some sort of “background check,” ask your friends and mentors, their friends, even. I asked some of hers and they all tell me one thing: she’s worth it. She’s someone worth being a fool for. (I’m using the word ‘fool’ loosely. You don’t have to become complete bonkers. Use your brain and have your friends check on you.)

To the people who’re receiving the loving, don’t be afraid. They are still them. They’re just becoming better in doing some stuff, but at the bottom of it, they still have their own identities. You’re just changing the way they act on some activities, not them in their entirety. Sweetie, if you’re reading this, I’ll admit that I have changed a bit, but deep down, I’m still me. I still stand to what I have said before, that I won’t change because of someone. It’s just that, I have become better. I’m still me.

In closing, I’d like to say that for all the ups and downs I have experienced, I’m still willing to push through. I don’t know what the future holds. In fact, I’m a bit scared, but why be scared? The future is sure bright, especially if you’d work on today.

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