Calling Someone ‘Smart’ or ‘Talented’ Completely Undermines Any Hard Work They Do
A few years ago, I picked up competitive dancing: ballroom, country western, and swing — to be specific. The impetus was never to get into competitive dancing, just to get a bit better at social dancing — I just became addicted to it, is all.
At my peak, I was spending almost all my time outside of work in the studio practicing (~40hrs / wk). By the time my first competition came around, I had put in over 600 hours and was feeling pretty confident in my abilities. And when a few of my friends saw the major transition I had made in just a few short months, they felt it appropriate to tell me that I had “a real talent for dancing”.
Despite the fact that I had barely been able to hang out most of my friends in the months leading up to the competition because of my consistent practice, they felt that I was excelling due to talent. I understand the platitude, but it completely invalidates all the work that I had put in to get to where I was.
And this doesn’t just apply to talent, it also applies to intelligence.
A year ago, I knew nothing about marketing and set out to learn as much as possible and get real hands-on experience in doing it. I watched hundreds of videos, read multiple books, wrote blogs, ran campaigns on various social media platforms, and even did marketing for a few other businesses! Needless to say, I learned a lot in a short period.
So, when a friend asked me if I could help them out a bit with their marketing, I gladly agreed to. Throughout the process of consulting with her, she would often laud how smart I was when it came to this stuff. Again, another platitude, but it completely dismissed all of the hard work I had done to learn the lessons I was then sharing.
One thing to add, here, is that when someone chalks up ability to genetics or talent, they unknowingly preclude themselves from the idea of being able to perform in a similar manner. And while the road to improvement might seem hapless or nigh impossible, don’t get discouraged because some people started off with a better foundation. As the saying goes, “hard work beats talent, when talent doesn’t work hard.”
