Thank You Basketball… 1/3/24

To sixteen year old Eric,

Take a seat. I have a story that you aren’t going to believe but I’ll tell you right now, you’re going places. It doesn’t seem like it as you look around in this very moment, but that little voice I know that is inside of you, telling you that you’re meant for more… It’s right.

Remember growing up in the driveway dribbling your basketball, shooting hoops until it was too dark to see and pretending to be Michael Jordan until it was too dark to see? As a kid, our whole life is ahead of us and from the time we were five, we were always certain we wanted to be a professional athlete. That’s going to happen but before you celebrate, hear me out.

For a long time, there was no basketball in our life, in fact, right now, you aren’t even playing. But you’re going to pick that ball back up and when you do, man… life is going to change in ways you can’t even fathom. I mean, look at you, this skinny kid from little, old Hightstown, New Jersey — you’re going to go to dozens of countries across the world thanks to that ball. You’re going to worry for most of your career but don’t, because if you do you aren’t going to enjoy it as much as you should have.

Now, I’m coming to you because for the first time in SEVENTEEN years, it’s time to truly put the ball down. I’m more grateful than I can express that it will last as long as it did so I want to take a moment to look back at some of those seventeen years and shed light on how to make this journey even better.

Growing up, things weren’t always easy for us. The lights weren’t always on, dinner some nights wasn’t a certainty and affording anything outside of what was necessary was always out of the question. Through all of that, if there was a ball, there was nothing to complain about because it was going to be okay.

But here’s what you need to know — soon, you’re going to hit this massive growth spurt. You’re growing to grow like a foot in the next twelve months and you’re going to pick the ball up and you’re going to fall in love with it.

Straight after school you are going head to one place every day — a park. Most days, you’re going to play for hours and if there aren’t any games running, you’re going to be envisioning what it would be like to play in front of thousands as you shoot around until the street lights come on.

Listen to this part carefully, though, some of the best memories you will have come from being under the bright lights— not the ones inside of an arena with thousands watching you, but at night at the county parks, playing with boys you grew up with and running the court for hours. The game is going to be at it’s purest form then, nothing but love, competition and most of all, optimism for what the future may hold. Hold onto that tightly and relish every second of it because you’re going to miss that feeling.

If you asked me to relive just one memory over those seventeen years, one of those nights would be near the top of the list. Shout out to Rucker Park, The Cage at West 4th and Dyckman, too! Legendary courts that we are going to get a chance to experience.

Speaking of legendary courts, I can’t forget to tell you about the opportunities at the Mecca! We grew up watching Knicks games on TV when they played at Madison Square Garden and you’re going to be there, too. Not for the Knicks, but you’re going to get there a few times and the feeling of playing at the Garden… I could write a book about that in itself. There’s simply no place like it.

It isn’t always going to be rainbows and butterflies though, I need you to understand that now. Your love will be tested and it is going to grind your soul. You’re going to get hurt — A LOT. But fuck, you’re going to warrior your way through that and always find a way to push yourself. Turns out you’re one tough mf’er, regardless of what people are going to tell you.

College is an eye opener but you’re going to chose the right school, so be grateful because your career isn’t going to go the way you want it to but it will all make sense down the track. A free education is great, but we chose the right people and that’s the key. Without those people, we wouldn’t have gotten to where we needed to, they help mold us and take a child and turned him into a man by the time he leaves.

Whatever you do, try your best not to fight that evolution. It’s going to be hard but it’s going to be necessary. If you do it right, you’ll go from overmatched on Day 1 to captain as a senior.

Here’s where it gets interesting — you are going to become a pro.

Playing professionally was supposed to solve all of our problems — money, status, opportunity, etc., but let me be clear, the first half of our professional career only makes things worse.

You’ll gain a little status and you’ll see how differently people perceive and treat you. Remember who is there right now in this moment, understand the qualities they possess and be mindful that not everyone has your best interest in mind.

The business side of basketball fucked everything up for us and that is my fault — I was naive and immature. I had an agent steal money from me, people not act in good faith and others lead me down a bad path. I had one identity — I was a basketball player — nothing more, nothing less. Don’t ever let yourself be put into a box, especially by yourself, make sure you’re evolving as Eric, not just as a basketball player.

Like I said, not everyone has your best interest in mind. Please don’t be so stubborn and listen to the advice the people you trust are giving you — it will save many headaches down the track.

Remember how I told you to enjoy your time and not stress? PLEASE be mindful of that throughout your entire career. Everything will work itself out as long as you put the work in, something you will learn.

At this point, you’re traveling the world, playing in numerous countries, seeing things you never thought you would AND getting paid to play a game! Life can’t be that bad, right?

Then mom gets sick. That really rocks your world. Brace yourself now because you’re going to lose her and it’s going to be ugly. She’s going to suffer and if you remain stubborn, you will, too.

You’re going to play a few more years in Europe before it all comes crashing down (because you stress yourself out.) You’re going to go into cardiac arrest in the middle of a game. They’ll save you on the court but doctors are going to tell you that you aren’t going to ever play again.

Things are going to get dark. Really dark. Remember when I said that our only identity is being an athlete? What happens when you don’t have that anymore?

Shit.

You’ll get through it but only just. The morning after you don’t think it will work out and there’s no reason to live anymore, you are going to get the opportunity that shifts everything: a team in Australia wants to bring you out.

No doctor tells you that you can play, though, but THIS time I need you to remain stubborn! Don’t take no for an answer.

I wish you I could tell you that you’re going to sky rocket to the big leagues again but you’re never going to get back to a high level in Australia. However, something is going to happen there that you aren’t going think would be possible —you’re going to find yourself again (or maybe for the first time ever.) You’re going to walk through the doors of your gate and the person who picks you up from the airport is going to change your life.

She’s going to become your wife one day. You’ll know it right away, the second you see her. It turns out mom was always right, when you know, you know.

You’ll play another five years and the following things are going to happen:

• All of those mental health issues you’re going to face (for what turns out to be many years) will be worked through.
• You’re going to find true and genuine confidence within yourself and learn to believe in what you can provide to the world. You’re also going to learn how it works.
• You’re going to help others. This is the big one. Businesses, schools and teams are going to hire you to teach their members how to overcome their own mental health, achieve their goals and work collectively as a team.
• You’re going to find the thing that gives you the same rush as playing in front of tens of thousands of people. I won’t spoil it but once you find it, make sure you follow that path, you won’t regret it.
• You’re going to make it to the NBA! Not as a player, but you’ll be part of an organization and you deserve it.
• You’re going to end up living in Australia. Think of it as being the exact opposite of what you have experienced to this point in every way. It’s cool, you’ll love the kangaroos.
• You’re going to change the people in your life drastically. This isn’t always going to be easy but you’re going to be better for it.
• You’re going to write at least one book. That’s pretty cool.

Now, I’m not going to lie to you, it’s going to be weird when we decide to stop playing but the good news is you are going to have the opportunity to step away on your own terms and that is something special. As an adult, all you know is to be a professional basketball player and this is a huge change but being able to go out on your own terms is something not everyone gets a chance to do.

All of this leads me to the big crescendo and the thing I truly hope you take out of everything in this conversation: you are who you are. Always remain proud of that.

You’ll learn that people will try to repackage themselves, prop themselves up and be something they’re not. You can always see through it so please, whatever you do, make sure you remain true to who you are.

Not everyone is going to like you. Not everyone is going to believe in you. Fuck ‘em, remain true to who you are.

At the end of the road, so many things are going to make sense to you. Be grateful, enjoy everything and remain true to who you are. You never know what those three things will bring you.

Oh yeah, one last thing — give mom a hug for me. There’s no one like her.