How to solve the self love crisis
There is a huge problem of a lack of self love in this society.
Where does this all come from? And how can it be solved?
Where it comes from is in childhood, when we are told we are selfish and shameful, and that we’re spoiled and not to be so entitled.
Lack of self love starts when we are hit and spanked as children, screamed at, shamed and told to go to our rooms to think about how bad we are.
There is so much worry and complaining that “kids are so spoiled and entitled these days” and that children need to be hit, punished and shamed so they know their place in the world.
This is not the answer, to beat kids down, break their spirits, make them conform, make them question themselves, make them doubt and make them feel horrible about themselves.
Just take a look to see how that’s working out for all of us.
It’s not working. The shaming, hitting, mistreatment and abuse of children is not working at all.
What is needed is a change in attitude towards children entirely. To encourage them, to appreciate them, to honor them, to see the greatness within them.
To heal our own wounds as much as we can, in order to avoid passing along those wounds in all the various ways we do so.
There is so much talk in personal development about finding the greatness within yourself. After we grow up being shamed and scorned and punished (and for many, worse than that). It seems that it’s only in adulthood that it’s somehow then acceptable to find our greatness.
Why not cultivate greatness starting in childhood? Why not notice the greatness already inherent in children right from the start?
And if we find ourselves struggling to do that, why not ask what our problem is, instead of insisting the problem is the child.
What are we adults so afraid of? Why are we so afraid of children?
We think we understand children so well, that they need punishing, they need “tough love,” harsh consequences, to be talked down to, spanked, belted, smacked. Then we tell them respect your elders, with no respect ever given towards them.
Hello? No wonder there is such a lack in self love and self acceptance. So many of us have had self love beaten and shamed right on out of us when we were kids, and now we’re spending our adult lives trying to undo the mental mess as a result of the mistreatment and abuse.
It is time for a different way of raising our children.
Let’s learn to truly respect children instead of demanding they respect us. Let’s honor who they are and trust in their inherent greatness. Appreciate them, validate them and hold them high.
That’s the answer to this self love crisis. And maybe by learning to honor and appreciate the children in our lives, we can provide ourselves with some of the needed healing we have been so desperately in search of.
