Why documentaries?

There are several things I have been thinking lately. How did I end up making a documentary film? I had instant confidence in it from the beginning. Usually, I plan things before executing, but the idea of this project was already in my head.

How come?

People ask me how did I end up making a documentary about my boyfriend. I tell them it just happened. The truth is that it’s not a coincidence, but a combination of many things. The documentary is something I have been training myself to do for a long time. My boyfriend only happened to be the protagonist, because of right timing.

How come?

Since I was a teenager, I used to go to a library to read biographies. I read stories of people who go after their dreams. Madonna, Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, Greta Garbo, you name it. I don’t think that is a coincidence either — to read biographies of a particular type of people. I used to go to documentary festivals, too. I watched films that depicted the injustice and the mystery of life. I come from a city with 250 000 habitants. When you think about it — it’s relatively rare that the next Nobel price winner would be from there. Finland is a great country to raise a child so learning about injustice was always an eye-opening experience.

I was used to the idea that after graduation I would have a regular job, buy a nice house, establish a family and that would be the story of my life. ”What else is there I could do?”, I thought. I had no idea, but “a calm and stable life” is what the Finnish state was offering me.

However, today I don’t have a regular job, own a house or have kids. After graduating from high school, I felt restless doing customer service. I didn’t feel the importance of the job. If I saw a client having a terribly bad day, I did my best to turn the day better, but if the customer was proud and snobby, I didn’t give a damn. I did uninspiring jobs, money being mainly the only motivation. Money shouldn’t be the main motivation for something you plan to do for many years of your life.

I met my boyfriend when I was 17. It simply hasn’t been our mutual dream to live a conventional life. Instead, we dreamed of studying, moving abroad and traveling. These ideas shaped my goals away from the conventional. Like everyone, I wanted to find my path.

Last summer I was in a cottage with my friends. One of them started a conversation by saying ”Erika, as you are that kind of a person who is particularly interested in other people’s lives…”. Back then I didn’t know how to take it — is being interested in people‘s lives a good or a bad thing? I was confused, because I hadn’t defined myself that way, but I think he said something very essential. I am very much into people and their lives. In San Francisco I met a girl who told me I was ”the most complex person” she knew. I didn’t know how to analyze that either. Does complex equal difficult? Then she concluded that it’s more like the contrary of being simple, that I can discuss topics from several angles.

Over time, I have realized that a few people have told me that I am easy to get along. I’m easy to rely on. Those are features I value a lot. I don’t see the idea of acting something you aren’t, making promises you can’t keep, pretending to care about people you don’t care about, etc. I think I’m pretty bad at pretending and being transparent makes me more vulnerable, but what do I have to lose? You like it or not. However, getting along with everyone is vital. Knowing yourself and being unapologetic doesn’t mean you need to be a dick.

Living abroad made me observe people and situations a lot. Different cultures make people think differently, and that’s why the level of misunderstandings rises. I learned that it’s safer to observe before jumping into saying something and then having to explain yourself. I have had the tendency of not thinking twice before saying. I still do that, but among people who know me.

I learned that observing more may teach you more about people and their behavior than guiding the conversation, because when you talk, you may say things to your favor. Actions rarely lie. Why was I so into learning the behavior of different kinds of people?

I only think it’s a super fascinating thing because humans are very complex beings and they sometimes don’t even understand or think about their behavior themselves. The most interesting question is always — why? To me, realizing how important it’s to try to understand people and their behavior and not being judgmental is the most valuable tool when making documentaries and in life in general. The thought that ”I would do/act the same if I was that person” has got me far. There’s so much more to discover in people than what you see. There’s a story behind their behavior. People act the way they do for a reason. People are proud, fierce, quiet, optimistic, pessimistic, humoristic, nervous, anxious, childish for a reason. To be able to explain your behavior to someone takes an enormous amount of courage and trust.

All these things combined is why I am making a documentary at the moment, and hopefully in the future as well. The thing is — I believe that because of my nature and experience I make a great documentary filmmaker. Being empathetic, unpretentious, curious and willing to understand is what this job requires. Education only gives you the tools. As a documentary filmmaker, I try to share understanding. It’s so easy to judge and make quick assumptions, but it’s dangerous. Imagine the world with people trying to understand each other more–more listening and talking before judging and gossiping. It’s worth dedicating my work.

Stay human, because you don’t know what other people have experienced. Perhaps they even don’t know it themselves.