“I’m running for president, because that’s what girls do”
The pinky promises that Elizabeth Warren made to young girls around the country over the past year shouldn’t feel so empowering. “I’m running for president, because that’s what girls do” shouldn’t be a motivational or inspiring message. It should be a fact. By the year of our lord 2020, it should be a given fact that any qualified human can and should present themselves to be fairly and equally considered for the position of leader of the free world. Or for any leadership position, for that matter. There should be no reason for this statement to be profound in any way. And yet, it is.
When I first heard this quote from Warren, it tapped something in me emotionally that really shaped the way I connected with her campaign from then on. Much more than a message of “anyone can be president,” or “girls can be whatever they want when they grow up,” this message was specific: girls run for president. And deeper than this, it was normalizing. Running for president is just something girls do, it isn’t shocking or revolutionary to see a female candidate, at least it shouldn’t be. It’s so easy for so many girls to see themselves in a message like this because it seems so normal.
As her campaign continued, it quickly became a no-brainer for me to stand behind the nerdy, passionate fighter with a plan for everything. Though I’ve never had any desire to be president myself, I am very familiar with being a planner, being overprepared, being “too” nerdy, being “too” smart, being “too” passionate… being too much. But these are all the traits I saw Warren demonstrate on the national stage over the past year. I need to just take a moment here to say how impactful it has been for me personally to watch a woman be so unapologetically nerdy, smart, and confident in the way that Warren is, and I’m technically a grown adult. I can only imagine the influence Warren has had on all the girls she made those pinky promises to.
But along with being able to see such an inspiring woman on the national stage comes the reactions of the rest of society. I’ll admit, I have always been optimistic and pretty naive on issues of misogyny and sexism. I consider myself lucky that it wasn’t until college that I was confronted with inherent sexism in a way that really made an impact on me, like the kind of experience that gets seared into your memory. Working in an office the summer before my senior year, I noticed my (male) boss would always give projects to the male student employees, even though I had worked there longer, had more experience, and was by all means more qualified. I confronted him and asked if he was aware he was doing this. He thought about it for a moment before saying “I guess I just trust men more.” At the time, I was just pleased he at least acknowledged it. In the years since, I (and every other woman in this country, I’m sure) have seen and experienced countless examples of ingrained, unconscious misogyny. Each time, I have been surprised at how deep it goes. On November 7, 2016, I bought a bottle of champagne to be prepared to celebrate the first female president. The next day, I was surprised yet again, and the champagne bottle sat unopened for weeks after.
Today I find myself losing the energy to be surprised. Instead, I’m disappointed. I don’t have the energy to be mad, I’m just apathetic. And right now, I’m far too exhausted to be hopeful that in four years, the result will be any different.
I am not a fan of cynicism, I think it’s a waste of time, but it is really hard to be anything but cynical right now. I live in a country where running for president IS what girls do. Starting with Victoria Woodhull in 1872 before she could even legally cast a vote for herself, to the 2020 Democratic Primary where we were lucky to have six women with the tenacity and drive to run for president, even though we, historically, have done very little to prove that these efforts aren’t futile. Running for president IS what girls do, and that seems to be all well and good, women can play at being leader, but actually electing them? That’s the step we can’t figure out. I am just so exhausted by our inability to figure this out.
I don’t want to sound like I think these efforts aren’t worthwhile. The advice Warren gave her staff today was to “choose to fight only righteous fights.” There is no question that this is a righteous fight and I will continue fighting it. It’s just that today, there is a weight in my heart. This is a disappointment that I can literally feel in my chest, and it’s tough to fight against this and convince myself to be hopeful right now. However, the other emotion I’ve been overwhelmed with today is appreciation. I am so appreciative that over the last year, Elizabeth Warren never made herself small. I desperately hope that all those young girls she made pinky promises to will remember that running for president is what girls do, and that they will not be driven away by the examples of how society has responded to the girls who run for president. It’s absurd and so painfully unfair to Elizabeth Warren and so many others that, despite qualifications, debate performances, preparedness, despite on paper being an absolutely amazing candidate, this society hasn’t figured out how to come to terms with women in leadership. Elizabeth Warren didn’t deserve this result, just like so many women across this country don’t deserve the same kinds of unfair, deeply ingrained, unconscious biases on a daily basis. I really wish I had a high note or an insightful one-liner to end this on, but my heart is just not in that place right now. I just sincerely hope we’ve moved past this by the time all those young girls remembering their pinky promises get to be old enough to run for president. Because running for president IS what girls do, and when they’ve put in so much work, have all the skills, run incredible campaigns, and make amazing candidates, they deserve to win.