Tired

I feel like I’ve been tired for as long as I can remember.

Tired of being abused. Tired of being told I’m not enough. Tired of having to work twice as hard for the same amount of recognition. Tired of having to prove myself. Tired of walking on eggshells. Tired of trying to be someone else. Tired of trying to be authentic. Tired because I haven’t slept enough. Tired of fending for myself. Tired of looking after others. Tired of shutting out emotions. Tired of feeling too much. Tired of sticking to the plan. Tired from reeling from crisis to crisis. Tired of never knowing where I’ll land. Tired of being on edge all the time. Tired of catastrophising everything. Tired of trying to live in the moment. Tired because I haven’t eaten enough. Tired because I’ve eaten too much. Tired of being the only one to participate. Tired of leading. Tired of trying to raise the bar. Tired of exceeding expectations. Tired of settling for less. Tired of being the one to make the effort. Tired of being belittled. Tired of being misunderstood. Tired of not being fulfilled. Tired of life.

Tired. Just tired.

And yet, life goes on.