Why You Need Negotiable Non-Negotiables

In order for me to feel my best I need to maintain a self-care routine. As part of this routine there are a few things which I consider to be non-negotiables.

Meditation, journalling and time to myself.

I need to do do these so that I feel present and in touch with myself.

I have a morning routine pretty much down-pat. I get out of bed, journal while sipping a cup of lemon and ginger tea, meditate and then fit in some movement before starting the rest of my day.

But, as we all know, sometimes life gets in the way. Sometimes we can’t stick to our ideal morning routine.

You might have kids that wake up before you do. You might have friends staying with you, sleeping in the spare room which is where you meditate every morning. Or like me this weekend, you might be camping with a group of friends, having lots of fun but not having much space for privacy.

How do you react in these moments?

Do you stress out about the change to your routine? Do you let this stress affect how you feel for the rest of the day?

Or, do you allow yourself room for flexibility?

Are interruptions to your self-care practices a stumbling block or a chance to connect to yourself further?

As much as I relish in my morning routine and as much as I need my non-negotiables, I also understand that they might not happen every single day.

This weekend I went camping with a group of 11 other people. It was a chance to disconnect from social media and socialise in person. We were barefoot in the bush and on the beach for two days straight. We watched the almost full moon rise and spent some much appreciated time in nature.

But, for these two days I didn’t have a chance to journal or the opportunity to meditate for an extended period of time.

My morning routine went out the window, but my devotion to my own self-care did not.

When I woke up in my tent I took a few moments to bask in the warmth of the early morning sun.

I practiced presence at the beach, feeling the sand between my toes and the cool saltwater wash over my body.

I marvelled at the moon and the stars each night.

I came back to my body throughout the weekend with a few big, deep, slow breaths.

Each night, before falling asleep, I looked back over the day and said a silent thank you to all of the amazing moments, conversations and sights that I had experienced.

I still took time to connect to myself, even though it was in completely different way than usual.

Looking after ourselves doesn’t mean always doing the same things. Having non-negotiables and knowing what we need to know in order to feel our best, is a great thing.

But our self-devotion and self-care isn’t solely about what we do.

In order to adapt to the different things that life throws our way, we often need to change our routine. While we might change the activities we do, we can keep a similar mindset and experience the same benefits that we usually would. Without actually needing to stick to our routine or our non-negotiables.

In my opinion, non-negotiables can and should be flexible.

If we change what we do (when we need to) but we keep the same awareness and intentions, then we will continue to feel our best. We will still be able to connect to ourselves. We will still be able to feel present.

Being flexible isn’t about letting go of your self-care completely. It’s about giving yourself permission to do things a little differently. It’s about letting go of the attachment to being perfect. It’s about allowing the cyclical nature of life and your moods to flow through all areas of your life. It’s about being ok with 5 minutes of self-care, rather than an hour, and still feeling happy within yourself. It’s about knowing that you can (and will) return to your normal routine when time and life allows it.