The Strength in Being Vulnerable
Let me start with this Ghanaian proverb, “Anyone who sells their sickness gets the cure”. Also, there cannot be growth without a weakness. Which is to say, you only acknowledge growth when you move from a lower level to a higher level which can only be achieved by being vulnerable in other to get assistance.
We have been taught over the years to appear prim and proper before people regardless of what is happening to us. We have been made to only see the weakness of being vulnerable which has led to the demise of people who shouldn’t or wouldn’t have died if they had spoken to someone about what they were going through. Some people have habits they cannot stop because they have not shared their problems. Still, others have not been able to finish certain assignments entrusted to them because they cannot appear to need help.
I understand it is not easy to appear you are struggling with something. It gets worse when you have made a name for yourself in your circle and people look up to you. What you may not have recognised or noticed is that you need a lot of strength to keep the things you are battling with away from everyone else (i.e. it is costly not to be vulnerable). This is something you cannot do forever because at a point you would have to let go and who knows, that time may be too late or a time when help is beyond your reach. Vulnerability is a strength.
Before I point out some of the strengths of being vulnerable, note that “ there is no certainty in being vulnerable.” That is, if you are worried so much about how people are going to use your “weakness” then you cannot grow and might not experience happiness in life as you should and probably end up in a way you never anticipated for yourself. I am sure Dr Brené Brown’s definition of vulnerability will help you look at vulnerability in a way you’ve not done before, which is that,
“Vulnerability is our greatest measure of courage”
The core reasons for advocating that you talk to someone are;
For intimacy, as humans, we desire intimacy and intimacy cannot happen without being vulnerable. It helps to make people appreciate and love you for who you are and not how you want them to see you. So that they are not disappointed and leave you when they mistakenly or consciously discover you.
For growth, As I said from the beginning, “you get the cure to your sickness if you sell it or make someone know about it”. Even those you think will point hands and use the weakness against you will be disappointed because you would have grown from that situation when they return to point fingers at you. Remember, one can’t grow without being vulnerable. We need to talk about the challenges to find solutions. We need to stop hiding because “vulnerability is a strength”.
Thank you for reading I hope it helps. Kindly like, follow and share.
An additional article by Tony Fahkry and a video by Dr Brené Brown will help free your mind so you can free yourself to live without stress.