The Hangover and the Man

The hangover and the man meet each other on Monday morning, when the man wakes up to get to his office job. They are no friends, but it is not their first encounter either. The man tries to hide the hangover from his colleagues and be boring, while the colleagues pretend they don’t scent. The man is a success, for he is not fired yet and he even got a promotion.

On Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday the man goes to his workplace alone. He fixes little bugs in the system. A Homer Simpson job, as he likes to call it, because it is easy and it dumbs people down. When he gets home he watches videos of Trump on a big screen and falls asleep, only to wake up to find food. But Fridays are different. On Friday afternoon, after work, the man goes to the nearest grocery store to buy the cheapest wine available: a drink he got used to before he had the job. After half a bottle and a couple of beers he drives to a bar to meet his high school friends, because high school never ends. They talk about life and love and order rounds of beer. Then comes the moment that in cycling is called the démarrage: the man takes off and leaves the peleton behind. The man orders the next round in loud voice, anyone can join, the company pays. Before the round is finished he orders the next round and helps people out that cannot keep up with the pace or that didn’t order beer in the first place. At this point, everything is possible. Life does have a point and the point is this moment of weightlessness. It is this feeling of flying that makes it all worthwhile. The landing takes place a few moments later on the toilet, where the man is found sleeping with his pants down.

After a weekend filled with booze, chicks and court orders for drunk driving, the man finds himself on the couch or in the fields waking up by the sound of duty. He somehow manages to get to his cubicle on time and he turns on his computer. The hangover and the man are reunited.