I Miss My Grandma

Esam Boraey
Aug 8, 2017 · 4 min read

In 2011, my grandma died at the age of 98. She lived a happy, healthy and fulfilling life, never sick until her final two weeks. My grandmother was a tough woman, the kind that’s built in Egypt, full of strength but with the most kind, loving heart. My grandfather was a pillar in our community, the one everyone turned to solve problems and bring stability. This pushed my grandmother to become a leader in her own right, taking over our family business, along with all of her responsibilities as a mother and later grandmother.

On her last day, I was hundreds of miles away, getting ready for a job interview when I got the phone call from my family, telling me how sick she was. They told me she said she wished I was there and would come home safely to Egypt. My mind was instantly filled with images of my grandmother, hearing every story she’d once told me in my heart again. I fell in love remembering her kind smile and strong spirit.

I remembered the story she told me of how she met my grandfather years ago. Her father and my grandfather owned a tree together and her father sold the tree, without consulting his partner first. In order to keep his partner happy, he offered his daughter, my grandmother as a bride to his partner. Both men agreed and she moved from her father’s house to her now husband’s house. She knew she had no choice and the marriage would happen anyway, so she decided to make the best of it.

She decided she would become the best wife possible, making her house the perfect, happy home. But she soon realized her husband was more concerned with his community than his home. She didn’t let it discourage her though, and continued to work to manage her husband’s home and eventually business. She even defended her husband when their neighbors tried to steal their land. She stood up for her home and her family and put everything on track again.

Through her life, she consistently put her family first, loving us all unconditionally. Once, she told me a story of how she fell down the stairs while carrying me when I was a baby. She broke her own arm while she fell, in order to keep me safe. She always told me, I was her favorite grandchild. I’m sure she told that to all of us, but I’m also sure she told me more stories than anyone else. I loved her and her stories more than anything.

I always wondered how she could keep laughing through the difficult life she led. She had four kids, a large business to run and her home served as the center of the community. Her kitchen was always open the whole day, ready to feed any guest or neighbor who passed by. When her parents died, she even added her three young siblings to her household to care for.

Her secret to life was very simple, just keep going. That was her main principle, her rule for life and the advice she always gave. She truly believed what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger and she never gave up. She taught me to enjoy the journey of life, with all of its joys but also its challenges and could make the best of any situation.

When I suffered my first heartbreak in high school, I thought it was the end of the world. She told me to keep going and make the best of it. She took my heartbreak seriously and told me that this was just an opportunity for me to find true love and start another beautiful relationship. When I wanted to follow my dreams and pursue politics, instead of becoming a judge, as my father had always wished, she took my side and supported me. She told my dad, happiness is more important than any material possession or job. She believed in me and my dreams for my country even when everyone else in my family begged me to stop.

My grandmother never asked for a thing in her life. She lost her parents, her siblings and eventually her husband, one by one and took care of everyone alone. She never showed anger or stopped sharing love with her family. Even in her last days, as she dipped in and out of consciousness, she prayed for her us instead of herself.

When I went home after her funeral, I felt the house for the first time without her. It was so sad and soulless. It was at this point, we all realized the balance she ensured in our home. She was the person we turned to in hard times, the expert to ask advice from without embarrassment and even knew when to just give you your space.

With every bad situation I face, I miss my grandmother. I miss her advice to me to keep going, her wisdom to make the best of any situation. Whenever I begin to lose hope or feel life is too difficult to handle, I think of her and push forward. She has given me the power to handle all of life’s challenges and for that, I’m forever grateful.