It’s not unicorns, it’s not cockroaches, it’s not rabbits, it’s the Spoiled Elephants!

In the last week a bunch of articles by VCs trying to make a name for themselves have popped up claiming to have found a better animal to brand successful startups instead of the unicorn.

The Rabbit (article)

Real
Actual
Business
Building
Interesting
Tech

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The cockroach (article)

“A cockroach, (…) is a business that builds slowly and steadily from the get-go, keeping a close eye on revenues and profits. Spending is kept in check so that it can weather any funding storm.”

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OMG this changes everything right?? Such wisdom.. such new facts.. such wow..
I’m sorry guys but to me it’s almost as mind-blowing as saying that being good in business is good for business.

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Well, I’m going to brand a ‘new’ kind of Utopian successful startup also then and from now on if anyone builds one like this.. I thought of it first!

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The Spoiled Elephant

How to spot it in the wild?
By it’s founder! He must be:

• Already Ultra Rich before even starting
• Have Ultra Rich Friends that help even when being a jerk to them for whatever self serving reason (a.k.a wall street Douches)
• No matter how bad the decisions are and how big the ego is, there’s always more money to inject or someone else to take the blame in case of inevitable failure