Photo by Jake Davies on Unsplash

Tell men you’re single — even when you’re not

Women get hit on every damn day.

Those raging vagina pheromones of yours attract a gamut of men in any setting, regardless of your marital status. Whether you’re happily married, boo-ed up or in a ‘complicated’ situation, there will always be someone who bypasses the immediate NO and sparks your interest. Guilt, mixed with pleasure, arises from flirting so closely with what could possibly be a disastrous situation, but viewed from another angle, these manly temptations have the potential to bring you closer to your significant other.

Creatures of desire, women want, seek and deserve to be desired. You want to know that you still got it. At times, you take your lover’s attention for granted, as well as the smattering of half-baked shoutouts from luring men. Exhausted from rebuffing advances, it can be refreshing when a stranger with potential actually causes you to blush. Witnessing intrigue from an unusual source can embolden you to skirt around your relationship status or boldly slip out the word, single.


This practice is not to be intentionally harmful, or even to cheat. However, if that’s your end goal, you might as well be single in theory, and in actuality.

The freedom of slinking into the single role as you please opens up a few beneficial possibilities you may be unaware of. For one, you can fully enjoy a conversation, knowing that your new man friend is not a) trying to convince you that he is better than your boyfriend or b) turned off by the fact that he can’t have you because you’re already spoken for. In his company, you can fill up your desire barometer with harmless novelties (compliments, suave light touches, etc). Inflate yourself with a gross amount of love for self and in turn, love for the man that makes you feel this special every single day.

Aside from enjoying a side dish of attention, you’ll find yourself playing the comparison game, subconsciously invoking the presence of your lover. Does this stranger walk on the outside of the sidewalk, smile in that cute, crooked way you’ve grown to adore, hold the same level of confidence and self-assuredness? The answer is probably no, and by no fault of his, his lack of similarities will have depreciated your initial read of him. Your mind will wander farther away from the present moment, thinking about how much better it would be if you were with the right one, right now.

Swatting away male advances becomes second nature as you traverse the earth in all of your womanly glory. You understand the kind of attention you draw, and love being committed to someone who makes you feel larger than life itself. The trust you’ve built in your relationship, coupled with the human desire for attention may propel you to entertain somewhat precarious situations.

But if your man is doing all the right things (and hitting all the right spots), you’ll never want to entertain these fools past a drink and a smile.

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