The truth about solitude

Picture by Maxence Brierre

Recently I’ve been having these flashbacks of my childhood when I recall myself sitting on the school bus, all by myself, listening to music on my father’s Walkman and peeping through the window.

The fact that I wasn’t talking or playing with my buddies had something to do with me getting dizzy, but it wasn’t the only or main reason. The truth is I was a lonely kid. Sometimes this has to do with being anti-social and others with having a superior IQ from the rest, which tends to lead you into a very boring conversation (I’m not going to say which is my case) but the result is always the same: not feeling comfortable with people around you.

This has been an issue to me forever. Teachers in kindergarten or high school have been pretty worried about my lack of interaction with the rest and they communicated their concerns to my parents in every single meeting.

As a result, I was forced to “make new friends” but that wasn’t what I needed, not at the time, not now. There’s some kind of cruel stigma to lonely people. Solitude it’s seen as a problem when, in fact, it’s not.

Men (and women) like me, aren’t crazy, nor sick or depressed just for the sake of wanting to be lonely. The truth is that we can express better our feelings when we are not surrounded by others. The performance of our jobs gets higher, depression disappears (as impossible as this might sound) and we feel more open to learn and discover.

Loners have a very intense inner life and tend to be complicated, but, who isn’t?

If you want to get along with them just let them be. It’s easy, you’ll see, just give it a shot.