Self-Care Practice
What is it exactly?
Self-care has become shorthand for a caricature of millennial self-indulgence, a hook on which everyone can hang concerns about ‘kids these days’ in all its ‘treat yourself’ grandeur. That wasn’t always the case though.
When Google search interest in ‘self-care’ was at its lowest point and it hadn’t yet become a caricature, the objective was to focus on something far more important than fragrant candles and bath bombs: mental health and self-care. According to Anna Borges, senior health editor for Self magazine and author of the book ‘The More or Less Definitive Guide to Self-Care,’ the mental health aspect of self-care is experiencing a renaissance, as pleasurable as those tiny indulgences are.
Ms. Borges explained, ‘I think it’s come full circle now, the self-care trend of face masks and bubble baths peaked a few years ago, and then people started rebelling and talking about how it wasn’t the same anymore.’
She went on to say, ‘It’s about mental wellness and self-care.’ As a result, people are re-evaluating it. It could just be a case of culture catching up with technology. According to Harvard Business Review, ‘Mental health awareness has reached an inflection point.’ Singers, actresses, and athletes are becoming more candid about their problems. And according to data issued in May by the American Psychological Association, we’re getting more open about mental health: A total of 87 percent of American people agree that having a mental health disorder is nothing to be ashamed of, and 86 percent believe that folks with mental health issues may get better, according to the survey.
From fad to advantage
The simple part is getting rid of our superficial self-care associations. Then it’s a case of trial and error to figure out what works best for you.
Physical, mental, social, and spiritual self-care can be divided into four categories. (Consider it a grab bag.) You can start experimenting with other strategies that might work using those frames of reference.
So, let’s assume you’ve noticed that you’ve been feeling particularly lonely lately. You could want to focus your self-care efforts on improving your relationships with friends and family, perhaps through regular phone calls or catch-up discussions. Let’s imagine your health has deteriorated. In that instance, your self-care can consist of developing a fitness routine. Whatever self-care entails for you, the important thing is to figure out what it entails for you.
Ms. Borges explained, ‘My concept of self-care is different than everybody else’s definition, and that’s kind of the purpose.’
There isn’t a single definition. It all boils down to how you care for yourself in order to arm yourself with the tools you’ll need to maintain your physical, mental, and emotional well-being.
Accept and enjoy the process
Self-care isn’t something you do, it’s something you learn to do. It’s a way of life. (I know, it’s a bit of a stretch, but stick with me.)
Ms. Borges remarked, ‘My self-care practice is very much that: It’s a routine.’ ‘I’ve learnt in the past that making decisions depending on how I’m feeling at the time leads to bad decisions.’
In Smarter Living, we talk about habits a lot and for good reason; they work. Building habits around positive activities eliminates the need for effort and self-control, you simply do them.
Let’s return to the example of loneliness. Loneliness has been shown to have a harmful influence on both physical and mental health. To counteract this, make it a practice to phone a close friend on the same day and at the same time every week. Building a habit is a method to incorporate this act of self-care into your daily routine, turning it from a one-time event into a way of life.
Another strategy is to think about what makes you feel good right now — binge-watching, Netflix and ordering pizza after a stressful week — against what will make you feel good in the long run — creating a routine around something that actually improves your mental health. It takes a lot of trial and error to figure out what self-care means to you, and there isn’t a ‘one simple method’ to doing it, but it’s well worth the effort.
Your idea of self-care will be whatever you want it to be. It doesn’t matter how much work you put in, what counts is that you do.
Ms. Borges explained, ‘There are a billion different things that may be considered self-care, and you have to piece them together to figure out what works for you.’
People expect instant fixes, but a lot of self-care requires long-term commitment.
In conclusion, figure out what self care means to you, develop a routine around it, and see how this helps you as time goes, and also don’t forget to be flexible in your approach.
