Divorce, The Second Smartest Decision of My Life
A story of a philosopher running away for his son because the the world was too insane for the son to run away in
Monologue
It’s 6 am
and as usual
I’ve been struck
by an epiphany.
I now know in
a bumper sticker form
why I’m so at peace
with having divorced
my wife:
run from son.
Legally,
a divorce
is a termination
of a contractual relationship
between the husband
& the wife.
Morally & physically,
for me,
my divorce
was an act
of running away
from my son.
Why?
Why would I
run from my son?
Because
I thought
in my heart
that in a sane world
my son was ready
to run away
from his family.
My son,
at the age of 16 or so,
already began
seeing through
his mom & I.
That was
of course
both sad & good.
Sad that
his mom & I
needed seeing through.
Good that
my son
at the age of 16
was now capable
of seeing through his parents.
That is
in my view
a monumental achievement,
one that
I am most proud of.
Seeing through others
is a mark of independence.
And that is
my goal
my desire
my hope
& my aspiration
for my son
my self
for the mother
of my son:
independence.
Independent
to do what?
Independent to
generate peace & happiness
on their own
to share with the world.
We cannot all live
as peace & happiness
cannibals.
Can we?
Bigger Picture
The smartest thing
I’ve done in my life
was to marry
the mother of my son.
The most miraculous thing
in my life
was seeing our son
being in his presence,
though I did not know it
then.
The second smartest thing
I’ve done in my life
was to divorce my ex-wife.
Now,
we are no longer
husband & wife,
just two humans
living on this Earth.
Now,
we are no longer
husband & wife,
just mommy & daddy.
And son.
We may be apart
living our lives.
But now
we’re learning to live
as humans.
When we
If we ever
meet again,
it will be
on equal terms.
Now,
that is drama
of true humankind.
That is
what I live for.
Dialog
ESr:
What is the source
of this famous quote
that is often attributed to
Socrates?
By all means marry.
If you get a good wife,
you’ll become happy.
If you get a bad one,
you’ll become a philosopher.
Opus.Claude.ai:
The quote “By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll become happy; if you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher” is often attributed to Socrates. However, there is no direct evidence that Socrates actually said this. The quote does not appear in any of the surviving works of Plato or Xenophon, the two primary sources for Socrates’ life and teachings.
The earliest known appearance of this quote is in Diogenes Laërtius’ “Lives and Opinions of Eminent Philosophers,” which was written about 500 years after Socrates’ death. In Book II, Chapter 5, section 26, Diogenes Laërtius attributes the quote to an unnamed source:
“He [Socrates] used to say, according to some authors, that one ought to marry: for if one got a good wife, one would be happy; if a bad one, one would become a philosopher.”
Given the late appearance of this quote and its attribution to unnamed sources, it is difficult to determine whether Socrates actually said it. It is possible that the quote was falsely attributed to Socrates in the centuries after his death, as was common with many famous figures in antiquity.
Despite the uncertain origin, the quote has become popularly associated with Socrates and is often used to comment on the nature of marriage and the role of adversity in personal growth and philosophical reflection.
ESr:
I have
a slightly different view
than Diogenes.
If I get
a good/happy mommy,
I become happy.
If I get
a bad/unhappy mommy,
I’m liable to
become a philosopher.
As for wives,
they’re just versions
of our mommies
that we pick up
in our lives.
Ok, ok.
A little sappy.
A little romantic.
But still
there’s a thread of truth
to the sappy words
me thinks.
Final Remark
My view
My ideal
of the husband-wife relationship
and
of the father-son relationship
is one
of inter-dependent relationship.
The conventional relationship
that emphasizes longevity over quality
is the model
is the ultimate manifestation
of co-dependent relationships
of master-slave relationships
of farmer-animal relationships
of Creator-Creature relationship.
We are both
Creator & Creature.
I know.
I know.
It does not
look at that
on the surface.
If you want to
see the Creator
within you,
you need only
take the time
sit & shut up
& look within.
But only the brave
Only the truly brave
are willing to face
the abyss within.
So there.