Looking Back at My 2 Years at UWC

Without UWC, I wouldn’t be who I am today…

Preface

I have been meaning to publish this for the last year, but I was never satisfied with the edits. In May 2016, as I approached the end of my “first” freshmen year, I felt lost about my future. But my wise friend suggested me to revisit my past to find times when I felt motivated and happy, and inform where I can go in the future.

That brings me here, rethinking about my UWC experience. The following parts are some recollections about my UWC experience. Some of it may not make sense, but it is my way of brain dumping, in the hopes that these memories can provide me some directions that I lost along the way.

So here we go…

Introduction

I realize that I haven’t written anything about UWC, except infrequent Facebook shares about our schools. I never felt the urge to reflect upon UWC because I thought I would continue the UWC experience in college because it promised a “global” program.

However, expectation often differs from reality. My one year at a traditional university was nothing but excruciating. That year was filled with disappointment, isolation, and desperation. It was traumatizing to a point that I swore to myself that I would never return to college.

At the end of that year, I was invited back to UWC China to help organize a camp there. Ten days later, I finally found the urge to write something about UWC, as someone who had lived in both the UWC bubble and the “real world”.

Our team for the UWC camp (I am at the bottom left-hand corner, pointing at the camera)

Foreign, Yet Familiar

Everything seemed foreign, yet familiar, when I first arrived at UWC China: new buildings, a new city, a new atmosphere. But occasionally there were spots that reminded me of my school, Li Po Chun United World College of Hong Kong (LPC): common rooms, flags hanging across the canteen, Sodexo Catering. The feeling was like stepping into virtual reality; there were things that I could recognize, but they seemed very distant and foreign to me.

Despite different UWCs scattered around the globe, we all have a lot of flags!

What made me feel the most uncomfortable were the people. The camp staffers from UWC China all know each other. Then there was me, in the middle of all of them, an alumnus, not knowing their names, their lingo, or inside jokes. I felt very distant from them, looking at them dancing in the common room, talking about their struggles with EEs and college applications. Meanwhile, I sat there worrying how I was going to communicate with those “kids”.

They were like me two or three years ago. But now I was their third year (The naming system for alumni at UWC is based on differences in graduating years. It starts with first year, who are classmates of the same graduating class, then second year, students who are one year older, and so on. Most UWCs only have 2 graduating class at any time. Therefore, most people have not studied with their third years, who are 2 years older than them). Even I, after two years of LPC, have never seen my third years. This concept was so foreign to me. But yet, at this place, my position as their fourth year — a person that usually only exists in the dusted yearbooks around the common room, and only mentioned occasionally among our second years. How should I approach them?

Eventually we clicked. It turned out we had a lot of passions, struggles, and hardships in common. We laughed about the same things, felt the same way about UWC and home, shared the same aspirations for the future. There were still differences that made everyone interesting, but the similarities were so distinctively “UWC” (which is very hard to explain), even though we grew up thousands of miles apart, had never seen each other before, and were raised in completely different environments. Most significantly, it felt like a community where we would support and care about each other, regardless of when and how long we had known one another.

Our visit to ISAK UWC Japan, where I felt their care and support not just within their 36 classmates, but with us UWCers from miles away

I feel surprisingly at home at UWC. Even though we are separated by our difference in graduating years, countries and experiences, we still have a lot of commonalities that unite us and make us UWCers. That feeling of familiarity is heartwarming.

Idealists vs. Realists

We constantly receive comments, both from other UWCers and people outside of the system, that we are too idealistic. True, our values are very idealistic given the current conflicts and challenges in the world.

But what is wrong with being an idealist?

Early on, I was constantly caught in the tug of war between idealism and realism. When I first arrived at UWC I was a realist. When greeted with conversations about “changing the world”, I felt very distant from that perspective. Why should I care about people who are not in my proximity? How could I solve problems that I can’t even see in my daily life?

Fortunately for me, these conversations became less conspicuous and out-of-place as time passed. Maybe we had so many of them that I had adapted to this way of thinking. In truth, I believe UWC changed me through those conversations. While I don’t think I became an idealist, the issues that I considered to be “too idealistic to discuss” became clearer to me because I was surrounded by people who lived with the repercussions of those problems. Humans are inherently empathetic, but are limited by the proximity of the affected and the extent of connection felt with those individuals. Being with people from across the world helped close the gaps between countries. More importantly, we stopped seeing countries as big tectonic pieces, but as faces and stories we shared.

A Chinese proverb perfectly sums up this magical connection:

The banner on the wall of our academic block, reminding us the bonds we forged in those two years

The retrospection of a third(or fourth) year

During my time at UWC China, I got to talk to my zero years (students who are still at UWC and are two years younger than me) about life outside of UWC.Looking at them, it reminded of what I felt like after my first year of UWC: overwhelmed and a little bit lost. I gave them some of my personal reflections and insights to advise on their remaining time at UWC.

It’s about you, not about others

While we talked about how can we change the world and impact others, what I realized was the importance to focus on myself as well. I used to focus more on how other viewed me, partly because Chinese culture emphasizes on social recognition, partly because of peer pressure. But as the days at UWC passed, I started to regret about the opportunities I missed: cultural evenings (evenings filled with cultural performances by students from a geographical region), exploring the arts and theater, getting to know people from different background.

Sometimes late at night, even when I was at UWC, I was not happy because I haven’t been doing things that I feel is satisfying. At UWC, there were so many opportunities but so little time, and that the opportunities can lead you anywhere. All the split-second decisions that I had to make ended up nudging me back into the comfort zone.

When I looked back at my 2 years, I feel like I didn’t make the most out of UWC. I don’t even have a close friend that is not from my country. I regretted a lot. During the 2 years that were supposed to be my most transformative years, I stayed in my comfort zone.

During one of my last few conversations at UWC, we talked about our life mottos and guiding principles. As I listened to theirs, I came up with mine to never make the same mistake:

20 years down the line, I don’t want to regret about the choices I have given up

Value of UWC education

During my years at UWC, I never appreciated the value of UWC education. There were problems with the community, school policies and in academics. We were living in this bubble too far from reality. There is no reference frame to compare with.

But when I left, and spent a year with people who are not from UWC, the differences are significant.

I become very receptive to other mindsets, but at the same time very adept in shutting out people’s thoughts. At UWC, people constantly challenged each other. Sometime it is important to accept criticism, but other times I need to stand firm to defend my values and identity. It was a struggle, but as I became more accustomed to this kind of conversations, I became more comfortable with changing ideas but holding on to my values.

I also have a well defined identity, but I am still refining it. Through living with people from different backgrounds, being constantly questioned and challenged about who I am, and exposed to unexpected opportunities, I was able to explore who I was, and who I wanted to be. But at the same time, I am very excited of the new experiences I have been getting, and the possibilities of changing parts of my identity because of them.

I am encouraged do things because I wanted to do them. Before UWC, I was constantly seeking for activities that will boost my resume. But when I got to UWC, the culture was to do what you love. The community was also great at supporting different passions. Whereas in other communities I was in, I constantly had the urge to fit in (e.g. party, underage drinking…). I am not saying that I never followed the trend. But as my interested drifted apart from my peers, I found myself not caring about how others think of me, but rather focusing on myself.

One of my greatest group of friends, supporting what I am passionate about, challenging my thinking and doing, and propelling me to be the best of myself. Time with them is unforgettable (all those late night conversations and “chur bao” work ethics)

All these changes are for the better. My self-understanding grew exponentially. I was able to pursue different opportunities that I wouldn’t have, and found one of my passions. I wouldn’t be who I am right now without UWC. It took me a year to understand, and I feel like I am still scratching the surface of what has UWC morphed me into.

Epilogue

In early August 2017, I had dinner with a very close 2nd year. We talked a lot about our lives after UWC. She showed me her notes about her 2 years after graduating. She said:

It is important to record down how you think and feel at those moments. There is no way you would feel that way anymore.

This writing was supposed to be published in October 2016. But it took me another half a year before I am willing to publish it. I was scared that I didn’t paint a full picture of UWC, and that I wouldn’t be able to look back and see how I thought and felt during those 2 years.

As I attempt to capture everything about UWC, I realized that it is impossible — I am going to change, and so would be my perception of UWC.

There is no way I could relive the memories of UWC like when I was there. But those 2 years shaped who I am, and will continue shaping me in the future.

Picture Speaks A Thousand Words

A lot of moments cannot be encapsulated in words (also I don't want to bore you with thousands of words). I include pictures below that can illustrate my two years at Li Po Chun UWC. However, since I was not an avid photographer, a lot of the photos were taken by my friends. Sorry for not PC everyone of you photographers because there are too many

Lesson learned: take more pictures

My first nights at LPC; spending time with friends in the dayroom (our common room at each residential blocks). I spent hours in the dayroom in my first year bonding with my blockmates (because we werenot allowed to be in other people’s rooms after a certain time at night, making the dayroom the only few places where we could hangout). I remembered my first DMC (or deep meaningful conversation) in the dayroom with my friends over life mottos and relationships from 10 pm to 7 am. That day I had to catch a train for China week at 10 am…

Gender-swap day; Getting all 5 of our prior schoolmates (we all transferred from the same school) together in a wacky way. Although we come from different years and not really knew each other before (I even had huge beef with Jaimie, third left), we somehow bonded over the UWC experience. The dinners with these 2nd years (Howard, left one; Matthew, left two; Rachel, right one) are few of the best memories I had in my first year.

Celebrating the first of many birthdays at LPC. We went the “extra mile” to celebrate friend’s birthday. We once kidnapped a friend to the rooftop, wrapped a friend’s room with newspaper, created a treasure hunt in the city… Since I left LPC, I have never had that much fun celebrating a friend’s birthday

We rarely got to dress up for anything (our usual attire is a sweatshirt and thai pants). But every once in a while, we get to wear fancy stuff for dinner. This was Christmas dinner in my first year with my friend Sakib (from Bangladesh)

One of the quintessential element of UWC is cultural sharing. We staged cultural evenings every year to spread our culture and traditions in an entertaining way. This is CCE (Chinese Cultural Evening) and we are finishing Kung Fu routine (look at me at the far right with that fierce expression…).

Most schools where we came from require us to wear uniforms. But UWC does not. At first it felt great because we got to choose whatever we wanted. But sometimes we missed to sense of belonging when wearing our own “uniforms”. Uniform day was unique to LPC where we got to wear our uniforms again and relive our “young days”

At UWC, I got to try out things I had never imagined doing. One of the things was Kayak Polo (where you play water polo on a kayak). This was me trying to score. Because of my determination (made obvious with my expression here), I was featured in the UWC International promotional video

One of my most memorable experience at UWC was visiting another UWC. We went to ISAK UWC Japan (at that time they were still applying to become an official UWC) to organize a conference with their students. During the time, I felt that we bonded like friends I had for years because of the similarities we had as UWC students. This was Yasu (Taiwanese Japanese) tackling me in a snow fight

It just happened that during our visit at ISAK UWC Japan, it was the third anniversary of the 311 Japanese Earthquake (The most powerful earthquake in Japanese history). We witnessed how the Japanese students experienced the earthquake and deal with that trauma. We all cried not because we were saddened by the tragedy, but because of the strengths they exhibited during the after the catastrophe. It was these personal experience that allow me to understand different cultures, not as news stories in TV, but as real life encounters shared because of friendships. Here, Gabriel (my classmate) and I are trying to entertain the crowd by telling jokes to liven up the atmosphere

We had 4 residential blocks in the campus, each with its culture and atmosphere. We, block one, is located below ground level, making us a rather “invisible” block. Even though we are not an “outgoing” block when compared to other blocks (Block 3 & 4 particularly), I loved our block because we bond over certain traditions (e.g. mocking at Magan’s accent, bragging about our extremely short block meetings…) But the most striking cultural trait of block 1 is our hustling base (the study room). I spent countless hours here polishing up my EE, practicing ACT papers, gossiping with block-mates. It’s a late night sanctuary for the academically focused, maybe?

If you ask me to pinpoint a defining moment at UWC, I would choose my time at SJYC (Sino-Japanese Youth Conference). It is a conference that brings youths from China, Japan and Hong Kong together for a 7-day, peace-focused dialogue. Not only were the participants multinational, the organizing team also hailed from 7 other UWCs from Canada, USA, UK, India, Hong Kong, Japan and Norway. Here are some of the organizers (notice that I am behind everyone sitting there exhausted. That’s because I hadn’t slept for 70 hours at that point)

What makes SJYC special is that it was a showcase of what we learned at UWC. At UWC, we were taught to mutually understand each other and work together despite of cultural and ideological differences. At SJYC, I worked with Chinese and Japanese from UWCs around the world. We had to overcome our cultural differences (e.g. Hong Kong people work best without hierarchy. Whereas Japanese cannot work without hierarchy) and our work styles (some people are more cautious whiles others prefer trial and error). What glued us together despite of vast differences was the passion of SJYC’s and UWC’s goal: to make education a force to unite people, nations and cultures to create a peace and sustainable future.

Being able to see the participants from having prejudice inherited from their parents on their friends, to bonding over common experiences, realizing they were unlike those stereotypes portrayed by their parents, and trying to understand them as individuals was very rewarding. It gave me a new perspective on the value of UWC education. As an active participant of the education, I did not understand the value of UWC. However, as I tried to impart the same experience to the participants, it became increasingly clear. It also showed me to power of education in breaking down seemingly unbreakable barriers.

The most important thing is I got to know some of the most intelligent, most caring people I had met. We gather together because of one mission, despite our cultural, geographical and ideological differences. Isn’t this the spirit of UWC? Here, Miki and I, a Japanese and Chinese, wearing t-shirts from past SJYCs, working hard to build our legacy because we cared about the UWC mission.

This is what inspired this whole post: Mini-UWC in UWC China. Here, UWCers from different nationalities and UWCs, gather together to impart what we learned and valued from our respective UWC experiences to 40 teenagers coming the day after. I saw myself 2 years ago in these zero years. I saw their idealism, passion, youthfulness, and most importantly the relentless drive towards the UWC mission. After a year in a traditional university, in reality, I was beyond grateful to rediscover what was important to me. Thank you!

This video is a great encapsulation of how I felt when I left UWC 2 years ago. When I watched ago it a few days ago, the feels came back. It was though I just left UWC. Thank you for those 2 years, my life wouldn't be like this without you.