How to deal with Type A Depression

As Type A’s we’ve always wanted to do our best. We want to hit every goal, and we want to help people, even if they irritate us. Most think of Type A people as driven and highly determined, but there is much more than that. There is something that most of us don’t discuss and that is what to do when Type A’s are depressed. In this article, we’ll discuss the following:

• Type A Depression Demystified
• My Type A experience
• What to do next

Before we dive in, I want to acknowledge that I am not a doctor, nor am I a psychologist. I am a Type A strategist, that experienced depression from the ages of 16–26. I still have depressive episodes from time to time, but I have system in place. Including crying in my room. I never told anyone except for a handful of people, because I was always deemed as someone who “had it together.” I wanted to share my story and some facts behind this to help others heal so they can go back to accomplishing their goals.

Type A depression Demystified

Type A depression is unlike anything you’ve ever heard up. It’s because no one who is type A will admit that they are completely stuck in a rut and truly can’t get out. There are several reason why Type’s A emotional on things like time or being efficient.

1. We always had to be the mature one

“ If you take responsibility for yourself you will develop a hunger to accomplish your dreams.”

Like our fellow Type A CEO, Les Brown, most Type A’s we take responsibility to a new level and often at a young age. I can personally remember a lot of people even at the rare age of 10 tell me that I was the “safe” one or that I was mother of the group. Most type A’s that I’ve encountered have always had to take responsibilities for others ourselves and others. Most Type A’s come from families that saw that we were more responsible and capable of handling things.

2. Our emotions come from the need to people please

We get stressed faster than most people, because we are actually conscientious of people’s feelings. We want things to work seamlessly for others, which is why we fixate on little details like time and efficiency.

3. Perfection

We focus on perfecting our careers because it’s measurable and achievable. We typically want to please people, but our goal is to measure how we can achieve our goals and what is our necessary step. This is why we love to-do list.

4. We’re our biggest critic

If you open inside a Type A person’s brain you’d hear some pretty dark stuff. We want to impress people at our job, but we also want to perfect our strengths and weakness. In many ways we think of every outlandish terrible thing as a form of self motivate. Author Joy C. Bell, explained a type A’s thought pattern perfectly.

“I am my own biggest critic. Before anyone else has criticized me, I have already criticized myself.”

5. Relaxation?

As I wrote this I started laughing. As a Type A individual we have a great motto: work hard and work hard. Enough said. Even when we are a beaches we must multitask.

After looking at all of these reasons, it makes sense why we can’t talk to people about when we’re sad. We as Type As have to be the strongest people in our network and honestly, it is sometimes hard for us to admit that we are sad or can process feelings other than inefficiency.

Depression can come from all shapes and forms. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, there are a plenty of signs and symptoms to pay attention to:

• Feel that you are doing enough
• Irritability
• Sadness
• Energy is at a lower level
• Feeling like you can’t get out of a situation

Depression can happen at any age, but often begins in the teens or early 20s or 30s. Most chronic mood and anxiety disorders in adults begin as high levels of anxiety in children- National Institute of Mental Health

I’m depressed?

Like most Type As I get a high from achieving my goal. In my last Huffington Post article, I am a person that likes to work hard enough that I miss out on Beyonce’s Lemonade, because of overworking. I am fortunate to recognize that my brief anxiety episodes uncover much more, but a couple of years ago that wasn’t the case.

Between the ages of 16 to 26 I experienced depression frequently. I would have mood swings, and I would have days where I would go without sleep, because I kept telling myself that I wasn’t good enough. Looking back at this I realized that there were tons of signs and past traumatic experiences, but as a Type A, and ENTJ I remained focus on being successful in my work. It wasn’t until I had group therapy that I realized that I had a problem.

In college, someone recommended that I join group therapy. There were a lot of problems that happened in my life; I ended my three year relationship with my boyfriend, I wasn’t talking to my family, it was all a hot mess in my mind.

My initial thought is that this girl, is crazy, but after weeks of insomnia and pain, I made the big step of joining, but like a Type A I didn’t tell anyone, especially my family because as an African American woman it was a taboo to go to therapy.

One particular experience helped me realize that I was depressed. Everyone was sitting in our circle, and the floodgates of emotions opened up. Many people opened up about coming out, being raped, and experiencing traumatic experiences. There wasn’t a dry eye in the room… Except for mine. I decided that it was best that I patch up all of the trajectory and explain that every thing was okay. This however did not settle well with everyone.

A girl in the group started screaming at me:

Is this is what you do, huh? You try to make everything better. You can’t make it better, this shit is terrible.

In my mind I thought I that I was supposed to perfect things. I thought I had to please people. I made people extremely uncomfortable. It wasn’t until I realized then I had a huge issue. I focused on so many other things, that I didn’t focus on helping myself emotionally. This began my three years of self discovery.

What to do next?

As type As its hard to admit that you need help, but the first step is to admit that you aren’t doing your best. You don’t have to tell that many people but you should seek help. Why do I say this is because the reason why we are Type As in the first place is because we are more likely to get a heart attack at a later age. Let’s start the conversation now, rather than later.

Let’s connect with me on my business page on my personal twitter or let’s chat on Instagram.