Thanks for this post. It was a perfectly timed read for me. I am a musician and teacher and in general, eagerly willing to share all I know and all I’ve learned — in fact, that is what my tumblr feed is all about http://eugesounds.tumblr.com/. I recently went through lots of angst in turning down 2 ‘”gigs”…. one was a group that asked me to play a gig and rehearse….basically for free. When I wrote them a nice note with my fee attached (I was willing to waive the rehearsal time) they balked. I had already made several rehearsals and played a few gigs with them. They are a fun band who appreciate my playing, but I was barely covering cost of travel let alone time invested in learning the material.

Another was an interesting and fun “project” to which I had already devoted several rehearsals and many hours of personal time to listening and practicing. When all was said and done, several factors led to my decisions: the “opportunity” vs possible future income loss/gain, the time already invested, and my personal health and well-being. In the end, time spent/gained with my beautiful wife and time saved for other professional opportunities led to my decision to “no”.

I think too often “artists” (and I include writers in that category) fall prey to this kind of happenstance, it’s in our nature to perform and to help. I know I enjoy being the “go to” saxophone guy in Dallas. But sometimes “no” is the right play. It’s not conceit. It’s business, tact and discipline. Thanks again.