Comparison Question — “Others vs I” or “I vs I”
Whom Are You Comparing Yourself With?
Do you keep yourself looped into comparison with others? Do you constantly keep thinking who is the best amongst?
Are you hooked up with your phone trying to scroll your social media every now and then to keep an eye on what’s hot about others with their lives and how are they doing? It is human tendency to stalk about their known ones to know whether they are doing better or not in their lives.
The Comparison, whether “others are better” or “I am better” keeps rolling in your head whenever you see that “Others” are doing better in terms of their wealth, growth, goals, dreams, and much more.
Does this comparison makes you feel better? Often you use comparisons in a wrong manner that might act as a trouble maker in your future endeavors or growth. It is unhealthy sometimes as you might lose yourself if you have this so called “Comparison problem”.
The Comparison Problem — “Others Vs I”
Your negative emotions or thoughts rise above the positive ones when you feel that abundance is missing in your life. It can also happen when you take things for granted with an urge of having more than what is present.
Why do you compare? Because you usually feel that grass is always green on the other side and are not happy with what you possess. These are the stumbling blocks that you keep adding up every time you compare yourself with others.
When you tend to keep “Others” first than yourself, it clearly showcases that your contentment levels are low and you keep looping yourself in the same direction even if you know there is a fault in the way you think.
Where does the problem lie? In the way we start perceiving things. A few of them could be the possible scenarios which might sound you
- How come he has more followers than me?
- His friends keep calling him, why I don’t receive any calls?
- I don’t have enough money to buy a phone
- I am not looking good
- How is she positive all the time?
It is never a trait when you put “yourself” first than others in your life. The problem is when you act selfish, sound undesirable, lower your self-esteem, become negative, and overthink about others lives which will make you feel devastated due to their progress rate being better than yours.
“I vs I” and Not “Others vs I” — Why You Should Stop Comparing Yourself With Others
Did you ever get a report of your phone usage which gives you a brief about where have you put your time more which helps you change your habits. In the same way lets say if you have a journal or a monthly report that keeps you updated about how much time did you lose yourself while comparing with others, how would it be?
Would it change you? If you practice it then it would surely do. If you don’t and continue being the same trying to compare your life with others.
There is no miracle solution that you will abruptly stop thinking but it is a slow and steady race to reach to a particular point. Follow a few steps below
- Keep a record of your thoughts : If you keep a record of your thoughts you get to understand the “valid” and “invalid” reasons of comparing yourself with somebody you know. You need to keep a track of why these comparing thoughts hit your mind and what impact did it bring to you? Make use of journals, apps, mind maps, etc. This will allow you to explore about yourself and where you are so that you can change your thought patterns accordingly.
- Social Media Disconnect : Are you hooked to social media? Does the notification sounds grab your attention? It is good to use social media but only when it doesn’t affect your thinking. If you lower your self-esteem, attitude, just because of a few people whom you feel are important in your life, then you are committing a mistake.
You never know the hidden truths behind everything as social media is a platform sometimes that is used for fake publicity too. When you disconnect from it, your attention about others goes low and you focus on yourself much more than you think of. - The I vs I : If “Others” come first in your list then “I” then you need to change it. When others come first you are always focusing on them and their growth rather than your own.
When you start thinking about “I” and compare yourself with “I” (You) tend to make healthy comparisons and when you start changing yourself everyday becomes a challenge that you would want to compete with. This will halt your comparisons with others. - Pictures don’t define everything : It is a human tendency on what they see they believe in it. When you see someone you know in a picture being happy doesn’t mean it would reflect the same. It doesn’t define anything that the person carries.
Pictures change your emotions for a second and then you are back in your own drama of life. You should refrain your mind from comparing yourself with the images you see. These are highly manipulative and can change your perception about everyone in your life. You need to just avoid them or forget that there is something that exists in their life. - Realistic vs Unrealistic : Your comparison should be realistic enough to bring about a change in your thought patterns. Lets say you compare yourself with the skin tone of others? Is this even realistic? Your birth was a miracle by God watching you, but making such comparisons doesn’t make any sense at all. Appreciate yourself for who you are.
Make realistic comparisons like, why the logic didn’t work for you?
why the code had issues even if it was the same? What's the difference between the approaches we have taken, and so on and so forth. - Accepting vs Rejecting : The main issue is that people don’t accept the things they are surrounded by the way they are. We have a greed of running in our mind that wants more than what is already in possessed form. When you compare yourself you need to accept the way things are.
There maybe a point where what you have others might not have. It can be anything in terms of quality, wealth, mindset, thoughts, attitude, behavior, and much more. You need to reject all the thoughts that gives birth to a person in you who always wants to compare rather than accepting things the way they are.
When are you ready to take action? Do you really want to compare yourself with others and lead a life with negativity, lowered self-esteem, unachievable goals, and much more? You need to take action and be ready to challenge yourself so that you always grow and keep moving ahead without any issues.
